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The Picture of Dorian Dole

Lebanon and Israel, Iraq, Afghanistan-- and Bob Dole having his portrait painted is big news. Here's the B.S. story to go with the stupid picture above. It's full of cutesy, Doley crap like this:

"'When I left this building 10 years ago, I said it was up to the electorate to decide my future address. In their wisdom, they decided they would rather see me in commercials than in the Oval Office,' he said, poking fun of his TV ads hawking Viagra and Pepsi after losing his 1996 bid for the White House."

(The real truth, Bob, is that if we could have voted on the commercials, you wouldn't have been in those, either.)

What struck me about the painting is that, even though it's meant to be a picture of Dole in his prime-- meaning, decades ago-- the real-life, 83-year-old Dole standing beside the portrait actually looked younger. Well, kind of-- and then, with the aid of Photoshop, I took a closer look at his face:

I've heard about faces like that-- they appear in the nightmares of guests on The Jeff Rense Show. And then I took a closer look at plastic surgery's "giveaway zone," Dole's hand:

Usually a shrivelled paw like that comes with three wishes (but don't take 'em!).

It's obvious that something unnatural is at work, but whether it involves the picture isn't clear. But beware, Bob-- whatever it is, don't overdo it. After all, you don't want to end up like . . . this!

Posted by Steve Monaco at July 26, 2006 4:17 PM

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