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My movie year (so far)

The Astronaut Farmer (2006), starring Billy Bob Thornton, written by the Polish brothers. I laughed myself sick at this stupid movie, but I know I was supposed to salute the flag and/or cry a river instead. I never waste more than ten minutes on new American studio swill anymore-- after all these years, I can tell when I'm going to hate something right away-- but I couldn't bring myself to stop watching this, it was that bad. A failed astronaut builds a NASA-quality rocket in his barn, so he can finally take that ride into space. Oh, my sides!

The main character is played with hilarious solemnity by its star (go back to killers, Billy Bob!), and the script is so sub-normal in intelligence it must have been fuelled by a diet of Play-Doh and boogers. Every heartwarming cliche since movies had color is sampled, while outrageous acts of selfishness and idiocy are portrayed as traits to be admired. If you want to have a good time with your friends making fun of a terrible movie, you can't go wrong with this grotesque piece of feel-good.

Billy Bob sez, "Take this, Sling Blade fans!"

The Park Is Mine (1986 - Canada), starring Tommy Lee Jones. If you want a good ridiculous movie to laugh at (and, I suspect, also with), this early cable gem will fill the bill. Billy Bob, er, Tommy Lee is at his best as a loveable-but-crazed vet who wants to teach Americans about compassion by blowing up Central Park. Silly as this cheap little cable pioneer is, it's more fun than the last movie you saw in a theater. Not only that, it also stars Yaphet Kotto when he still sported his own hair.

Posted by Steve Monaco at June 27, 2007 12:32 AM

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