April 2008

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The Monday Movie Quiz #173

She may not be the star of the movie, but once you see her, you never forget her. And what a voice!

Know the film she was in? Then send me an email by late Sunday-- if you're right, you'll see your name in next week's heavenly winner's circle.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 28, 2008 3:25 AM

 

Last week's Movie Quiz winners

One winner spoke for nearly all the others with his one-sentence review of last week's quiz movie-- "Light of Day is exactly what that movie should not see." Maybe it's not that bad, but it's not very good, and today the only real reason to watch it is for Joan Jett in her first feature film.

While it was sold as a Michael J. Fox movie, the real star of Light of Day was Jett. She was completely believable as a rock singer and single mom who can't handle both at once. While that description makes it sound like a role for Shirley Jones, Jett had to handle some pretty grim scenes-- lost custody, dying mother-- and was surprisingly good. I'd even say she was better than Fox, but how hard is that?

(One winner wrote, "Seeing Joan Jett in the flower of her youth was interesting-- it's hard to remember her fresh and un-weathered." Maybe so, but she seemed to be holding up pretty well in the pics of her performance at the Roseau County Fair in 2006. And she seems to be pretty accessible to her fans.)

Light of Day was written and directed by the author of Taxi Driver, and as another reader noted, "Good ol' Paul Schrader-- he couldn't make a feel-good hit if his life depended on it." Schrader may have also planned on making a slighty different movie, because he was originally counting on using a different Bruce Springsteen song for the title. Or, as a quiz winner summarized, "Springsteen was asked to write a song for the original title, 'Born in the USA,' then decided that the results were too good to toss away on the likes of Paul Schrader. Schrader got a new song and title, while the rest of us got . . . well, Light of Day."

The song is a good one, though, and Jett's duet with Springsteen himself is probably the best version of all. Joan outsings him easily-- these days, Bruce hoots and screeches like a hillbilly with a hotfoot-- but Springsteen's guitar work is the best part. I'm a longtime non-fan when it comes to The Boss, and even I like this.

Even if they didn't like the movie, a fair number of people knew what it was, so congratulations and a picture of an unweathered Joan to the following: Vince Tuss, Wayne Palmer, Song-Un Lee, John Seffl, Jim Moomey, Nancy Louise Rutherford, Bob Redwing, Shaun Faulkner, Michael Mattson, ron frigstad, Dave Mallow, Thomas Miller, Bill Hearne, Kevin Musolino, Kenneth Gramer, E. Yarber, Fred Lorence, and Denny Lynch.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 27, 2008 10:54 PM

 

Couch Pundit's Sunday Funnies

The writer of the following one-page '60s gem was Dell Comics' resident genius, John Stanley. Stan Lee may have written the adventures of both Spider-Man and Millie the Model (admittedly, quite the creative stretch, and all hail to Stan the Man!) but keep in mind as you read the following that it's by the same guy who was responsible for one of the sweetest kids' comics ever created: Little Lulu.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 27, 2008 3:37 AM

 

Great moments in movie history

It's a double feature of clips that could be called pioneers of the music video, directed by two of the movies' all-time greats.

The first is "Drum Boogie" from Ball of Fire (1941), directed by the immortal Howard Hawks. Barbara Stanwyck is lust-alicious singer Sugarpuss O'Shea, and the bandleader is WWII-era superstar drummer Gene Krupa. The first half is amazing-- big-band rock-and-roll, really-- but it's the hushed second half that stuns, when you realize Krupa really is playing with matchsticks.

A couple decades later, a movie could get away with more than just the name "Sugarpuss," but even so, Erica Gavin's "fish dance" from Russ Meyer's Vixen! really pushed it. Today, it would be rated PG, at the most, but it was eye-popping in its day, and even now some of you might not want to watch it at work. Let's just say that the symbolism is blatant. (And note the Shatner-ish guy who's loving every smelly moment.)

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 24, 2008 3:04 AM

 

The Monday Movie Quiz #172

Talk about movie trivia! It's hard enough to believe these two people were in a movie together, let alone come up with the title. But if you know it, send me an email by late Sunday, and if you're right, we'll sing your praises in next week's winner's circle. (You talkin' to me?)

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 21, 2008 2:47 AM

 

Last week's Movie Quiz winners

Last week's quiz movie in question was Bob Roberts, Tim Robbins' 1992 political satire (and directorial debut), and it inspired a fair amount of commentary. "For all its flaws, I love this movie-- it still gives me the chills about how prescient it was about the direction of Republican politics." "I rewatched it a few years back and if anything, it's more relevant today than it was in the early '90s." "Oh my God-- that's Jack Black in pic #3!"

Even those who don't love it have to admit that the film's political prescience is indisputable. Robbins played the title character, an ultra-rightwing entertainer who's running for the Senate, and the film is done as a mockumentary detailing his campaign. Much of what Robbins parodied was the twisted directions that politics and media coverage were going at the time, but watching it today is like seeing an almost quaint prediction of the politics/news nightmare that we live with now.

Like this:

Robbins took many chances with his film (just making it at the tail-end of the Reagan-Bush years was a huge one), but the biggest gamble was also his masterstroke: using Gore Vidal for the role of Bob's senatorial rival, Brickley Paiste. What Vidal lacked as an actor, he more than made up for with his wonderful improvised dialogue. And Vidal was in on the main joke: that his old-school liberal character (speaking Vidal's own words and thoughts) was the loser.

Even though the email this week was fairly political, there was just as much from people who were surprised to see Jack Black in the clues. Actually, the cast of Bob Roberts is full of recognizable names and faces, like Alan Rickman (clue #2), James Spader, John Cusack, Helen Hunt, Susan Sarandon (of course), and David Strathairn, just to name a half-dozen. But yes, it was Jack's first feature film, and even then, he stood out as one of Bob's super-fans. "I remember those creepy kids, and to realize it was Jack Black-- man, that's too much." Here, then, is Jack's first movie closeup:

So congratulations and a Bob button to the following winners: Vince Tuss, Thomas Miller, Wayne Palmer, Song-Un Lee, Jack Sparks, Corey Anderson, Dean Carlson, Michael Mattson, Bob Redwing, ron frigstad, Jim Moomey, Fred Lorence, Bill Hearne, Kenneth Gramer, Dave Mallow, Nancy Louise Rutherford, Joe Rosenberg, E. Yarber, Kevin Musolino, and Stacy Sarrette.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 21, 2008 12:37 AM

 

Rotten old rocker of the week

Announcing a new feature: videos of terrible performances by R&R legends who shouldn't be performing at all, because they're just too goddamned old.

Naturally, the inspiration is the ghoulish-looking new Rolling Stones movie directed by Martin Scorsese (it should have been George Romero)-- going by the clips, the Stones are now so creaky and worn-out, they really need to make this their last gasp before they actually have one onstage. And the rest of the sixties generation (now both the era and their decade of life) should join them in calling it quits. It should be a rule, if not a law, that when you're old enough to be honored in a hall of fame-- that is, a museum-- you must retire from rock and roll.

To get us started, here's what I'm talking about taken to its most ridiculous extreme: an 80-year-old Chuck Berry doddering through the Pulp Fiction favorite, "You Never Can Tell." Besides sounding like he's already deceased, Chuck treats his ripped-off audience to guitar playing so inept, I'm surprised the crowd wasn't convulsed with laughter. (I was.)

P.S. Know about a video of another old R&R band or singer that's as bad as this? Then by all means, please send me the link. I'll give credit for the find (or not, if you'd rather-- this one was sent by "anonymous"). But it has to be really bad!

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 19, 2008 11:53 PM

 

Thomas Ott, the god of comics noir

The wordless stories by Swiss artist Thomas Ott have been giving me the kind of comics-reading pleasure I didn't think I'd ever have again. Not that there's anything "pleasurable" about what happens in his stories or their exquisitely-rendered panels-- they're filled with knives in the back (in more ways than one), horrific facial expressions, and a sense of humor that's blood-drenched.

His are graphic short stories, not novels, but he packs in so much narrative and artistic detail in each one that repeated readings are a sardonic joy. Because he tells his nightmare stories so well with his balloon-free panels (no English translation necessary, thank goodness), you're tempted to zoom to the punchline, but it's the second and even third look that reveals how rich his dark fantasies really are.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 18, 2008 2:03 AM

 

Great moments in TV history

Lon Chaney Jr. was a great Wolfman, but by the early '50s his alcoholism restricted him to roles where his character didn't speak. So in 1952, he played Frankenstein's monster on live TV-- a very drunk Frankenstein's monster. Another version of this short clip is titled "Frankenstein hurts a young boy." The kid's yelp at the end could be caused by either his co-star's over-exuberant grip or eyebrow-scorching booze breath. You decide.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 16, 2008 5:21 AM

 

The Monday Movie Quiz #171

Three people you wouldn't expect to see together in one place, but they all had special roles in this week's quiz movie in question. So what is it? If you know, send me an email with the title by late Sunday-- if you're correct, prepare to feel the swelling pride that comes from seeing your name in next week's ultra-patriotic winner's circle.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 14, 2008 12:03 AM

 

Last week's Movie Quiz winners

Is there a better-known last line than "Soylent Green is people"? It may as well be the movie's title, and it was in every answer from every single quiz winner. It's possibly the most parodied line/ending of all time, so even if you've never seen it, you know the big "surprise," which is obvious ten minutes into the story.

For all its hokum, Soylent Green (1973) had as bleak a view of the world's future as any science-fiction film Hollywood had made up to that point. Thanks to its source material, the novel Make Room, Make Room by Harry Harrison, its plot ingredients-- food shortages and riots, corporate evildoing, and environmental disasters-- apply to our own ongoing 21st century far too well. (We didn't get the euthenasia centers, but considering what the euthenized got used for, I'm not complaining.)

Of course, MGM watered it down and hoked it up-- Blade Runner it's not-- and even so, it's still not bad. Several winners remarked on Edward G. Robinson's performance in his last film-- he died shortly after its finish, and knew it was coming while he made it. His death scene is especially touching to old movie fans, who know him for great work like Little Caesar and Key Largo, but even people who've never seen him before are moved by it. His co-star, Charlton Heston, said that his own tears in the scene were genuine.

As for the scene itself being "the most horrifying death scene ever," the guys at stomptokyo do make a good point. (You may have to scroll up a bit to read the caption.)

Speaking of death and Heston, Chuck left us last week at the age of 83. Before he went on his "guns-and-Moses" kick, he was a decent actor who made some better-than-decent movies. Someone commented in an obituary that Heston was the right man for a new Hollywood in the '50s-- competing with TV, movies got bigger and more majestic, and Heston was the first epic actor.

But it's looking like the epics won't be the movies he's ultimately remembered for. It'll be movies and moments like this.

Of course, the email box was stuffed this week with correct answers and bad jokes, so congratulations and a date with Dick Van Patten (click the stomptokyo link!) to the following fans of soy-ence fiction: Wayne Palmer, Song-Un Lee, Joe Rosenberg, Dean Carlson, Mark Gisleson, Spencer Abbe, ron frigstad, Shaun Faulkner, Dave Mallow, Fred Lorence, Bob Redwing, Jack Sparks, Bill Hearne, Thomas Miller, Vince Tuss, John Seffl, Bill Kelly, Kenneth Gramer, Nancy Louise Rutherford, The Curmudgeon, Bob Aulert, E. Yarber, Jamie McFarland, Kevin Musolino, and Denny Lynch.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 13, 2008 6:18 PM

 

Great fight scenes in movie history

I was a Tony Jaa fan as soon as I saw the tree-climbing opening of Ong-Bak, an action film as good as any of Jackie Chan's Hong Kong best. Tony may not be an actor, but so what? He kicks ass, knee, spine, and skull like nobody else.

I was disappointed by his follow-up film, Tom yum goong, aka The Protector (made with Ong-Bak's director, Prachya Pinkaew), but the final, amazing fight scene is Tony Jaa at his finest. The fight itself is unbelievable, but doing it all in one continuous, four-minute take??

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 8, 2008 2:42 AM

 

The Monday Movie Quiz #170

Once again, it's a quiz torn from today's headlines:

If you know what it is, then you also know what "it" is (a cryptic if easy clue). And I'm sure you do, so send me an email by late Sunday with the title-- if you're right, expect to see your name in next week's cold, dead winner's circle.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 7, 2008 2:53 AM

 

Last week's Movie Quiz winners

Last week's movie in question, Who's Harry Crumb? (1989), has everything you'd expect a late '80s comedy to have, like lame jokes with painfully obvious setups, a supporting cast straining at the seams to be funny, and a soundtrack so terrible you wish they'd never invented the synthesizer. (Also, a poster with a scene that doesn't exist in the film.) So the question is begged: Why use it for the quiz?

The answer is its star, John Candy, one of the funniest men who ever lived. And as imperfect as this little private-eye spoof is, for better or worse, Who's Harry Crumb? may be the purest example of his comedy outside of his work on SCTV.

The sad truth is that none of Candy's films lived up to the great days of SCTV, and the ones that were the biggest hits-- the John Hughes stuff like Planes, Trains & Automobiles-- were the least like that wonderful show. Who's Harry Crumb? at least tried for SCTV-style genre parody, with the original's combination of crazy slapstick and character-based humor fuelled by a good makeup department.

Stupid detective Harry Crumb isn't in the same league as SCTV greats like Johnny LaRue and Doctor Tongue, but he's a lot closer to it than Uncle Buck. Plus, the movie's generic kidnapped-daughter plot gave Candy more chances than the Hughes movies to method-dress like he did on the show. Five years later, he died on the set of another bad movie-- Who's Harry Crumb? was the only one of his films Candy produced. Who knows what the second try might have been like.

I'll leave it up to you to search youtube for John Candy and SCTV clips-- they're everywhere, and they're all funny. (Okay, since you insist, here's one of my faves, John as Orson Welles). The Candy video I want to share is a 35-second clip from Canadian news, posted by the guy who gets the autograph at the end. Watch this, and compare it with the celebrity behavior you see today.

Lots of Candy fans, not so many of the film, so congratulations and one free disguise to the following winners: Wayne Palmer, Song-Un Lee, greg, Kenneth Gramer, Bob Redwing, John Seffl, ron frigstad, Michael Mattson, Joe Rosenberg, Nick Rupar, Bill Hearne, Doug Smith, Paul Rignell, Thomas Miller, Fred Lorence, Nancy Louise Rutherford, Dave Mallow, Justin Cullen-Benson, The Curmudgeon, E. Yarber, Mark Gisleson, and Stacy Sarette.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 7, 2008 12:05 AM

 

Great moments in movie history

I think almost anything with Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy is a great movie moment, but their 1938 feature Blockheads is especially packed with some of their best and funniest material. Only an hour long, it's nothing but jokes, almost all of them perfect. This clip is a prime example of the boys at work-- all you need to know is that Ollie's apartment is at the top of a long flight of stairs, and they're in a hurry to retrieve an incriminating note before his wife sees it.

Posted by Steve Monaco at April 4, 2008 1:55 AM

 

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