Getting detention for poor penmanship
This week's stupid criminal: 27-year-old Cory Fitzgerald Jackson, whose penmanship got in the way of his attempted hold-up, according to a Hennepin County criminal complaint.
A Walgreens clerk explained to the cops that Jackson had walked up to the counter and handed over an indecipherable note. When asked for an explanation, Jackson told the clerk that the note read: "This is a stickup. Empty the register. I have a gun."
The clerk summoned a manager. Jackson waited patiently by the register. The police were called. Jackson was ordered outside to await their arrival, whereupon he was duly arrested.
Jackson initially informed the officers that an unknown person had slipped the stick-up note under his door while he was sitting at home. The anonymous scribe had purportedly threatened to hurt him if he did not rob the Walgreens.
In a subsequent interview, however, Jackson changed his story, informing the cops that his girlfriend had put him up to the botched robbery.
The Brooklyn Park resident has been charged with attempted aggravated robbery. He is currently in custody at the Hennepin County Jail.