Breakfast of Champions 6/27: Pestilence

Since I rarely get sick, it's easy to forget how miserable the condition can be. I've got as much energy as a sloth on a Nyquil binge, and yesterday I was so out of it I linked to a Flash animation of David Hasselhoff in a speedo.

What a time to get the pestilence, too, with summer in full swing and the month in photos showing me what I'm missing.

Plenty of newsworthy phenomena to keep the mind occupied. According to Monocle Magazine, Minneapolis is one of the 20 most livable cities in the world. Praise from something called "Monocle" (it's a British magazine, of course) conjures up images of being praised by the guy from Monopoly, or possibly Mr. Peanut.

What does a good governor do to a naughty like constituency? First, he lifts up her skirt. Then he spanks her. Then ... harder ... harder ... harder! At least that's how it was in the 1930s.

I was there for Beth Walton's Wondrous Punch Experience. No, that's not why I'm sick. No, it wasn't me in the bike helmet. Yes, that's why they call it the "Wondrous Punch in the Head."

Minneapolis native Matthew Santos, part of Kanye West's Glow in the Dark Tour, took some time to speak with Andrea Myers.

This weekend is the Great American Campout, a time to get out from in front of your computer screen and enjoy scenic byways. Needless to say, I hope you do not do this. The Internet would miss you, you see.

Did anyone else read this and think of the game Oregon Trail? Not that I want to be making jokes about dying of dysentery in my present condition.

Josh Homme from Queens of the Stone Age is sick, too, and used his illness as an excuse to go off an a homophobic rant at some 12-year-old. First Immortal Technique, now Queens of the Stone Age. Add another to the list of artists to boycott.

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