Target Field to be located across Target Plaza from Target Center

Here in Minneapolis, we've long felt ourselves behind the curve, out of the loop, yes, I daresay even stuck inside the outmoded box, by having our beloved sports franchises playing in the non-revenue-generatingly-named Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome.

Which is what makes so exciting the news that the taxpayer-subsidized baseball complex slowly rising just a stone's throw from City Pages' august offices will be named, in honor of the right reverend Target Corporation, 'Target Field'. In a related development, the forlorn no man's land between it and Target Center will be rechristened 'Target Plaza'.

Stepping out of the Spin Zone for a moment, it is and will forever remain suboptimal and tacky to name our taxpayer-financed ballpark after a corporation, even if it's a local one, even if everyone else is doing it, and, yes, even if it ostensibly helps lower taxpayer burden.

But let's be honest. This could have been worse. Take these locally-themed corporate names that were passed over:

Scotch-Brite Stadium
EnRhythm Park (after the Medtronic pacemaker)
Thrivent Financial Field for Lutherans
Frosted Mini-Spooners Stadium
Fingerhut Field

And as for Target Plaza, consider the alternatives:

Geek Squad Square
General Mills Crossing
The Spam Zone
Malt-o-Meal Overpass

We're still bracing, however, for the Slumberland Home Run Porch.