Rich Will Wanket is the masturbation real estate pro

A lifetime of playground taunts parlayed into fifteen minutes of internet glory.
"Beat it. Flick it. Choke it. Rub it," urges Richard William Wanket in an advertisement for his services as a real estate agent with Edina Realty. "It's all Real Estate Masturbation if your agent isn't doing the work necessary to help you buy or sell your home."

The ad, which first ran in the local edition of the Onion in July, has catapulted to a much wider audience online in the last 48 hours, blowing up those corners of the internet where jerk-off-joke realty ads thrive.

Yesterday afternoon it made it to the mega-site Boing Boing, after it was initially scanned by the Stuff About Minneapolis blog.

"I've been getting a lot of calls since the ad took off," Wanket says. "Not all of them have been from people who want to buy or sell a house, but that's not really the point. I just wanted to get my name out there."

Edina Realty was not amused.

"Rich Wanket is no longer one of our agents," Lynn Clare, Vice President of Marketing for Edina Realty, said today. "Our realtors are independent contractors, but their advertising has to adhere to our guidelines, and this ad clearly did not."

Really? Why not?

"Well, first of all, it didn't have the required Fair Housing notification on it," Clare said. "Also, you know, it's not a message that we feel is reflective of our brand."

So there you have it: Edina Realty isn't one of those masturbator-friendly realty shops. If you want that, you'll have to visit Wanket, who says he plans to stay in real estate.


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