10 ways the Vikings' season can get more bizarre

Categories: Sports
Brett.Favre.jpg
Image courtesy of shgmom56
Will Favre have a special announcement?
The Vikings improved to 5-7 with a 38-14 home win over the lowly Bills Sunday, and in the process furthered a seasonal script that couldn't be conceived by Aaron Sorkin on mushrooms.

Brett Favre made his 297th consecutive start, only to be replaced by backup Tarvaris Jackson after the graybeard was knocked from the game early while attempting his first pass of the day.

Vikings' interim head coach Leslie Frazier, rebuffed by Buffalo in their head coaching search last season, ran his own record to 2-0 at the Purple helm in an oft-ugly game that featured nine total turnovers. Jackson was responsible for three of those babies via interception, but still meshed some impressive play (15-of-22 passing; two TD's) to couple with the miscues.

As Favre's health is evaluated and a certain Favre/T-Jack quarterback debate takes hold in ensuing days, let's have a look at 10 ways this already-insane season could get a little crazier: 

1.  Wholly unburdening himself, Brett Favre reveals that Jenn Sterger is pregnant with his illegitimate child.  The baby has yet to decide if he'll arrive on the projected due date.

2.  The Supreme Court reverses course and decides to hear the never-ending StarCaps case.  Pat Williams announces that he will serve as lead counsel for both him and fellow Vikings' lineman, Kevin Williams.

3.  The Vikings' organization, ultimately exhausted in their pursuit of a new stadium (in a state over $6 billion in debt), opts to simply bully the Gophers out of TCF Bank Stadium.  Each member of the 53-man roster is ordered to "bring ten lawn chairs" on gameday; each temporary seat is situated at field level and sold for $500 apiece.  Total value for 11 games (2 preseason, 8 regular season, 1 playoff) = $2,915,000.

4.  In an homage to Mike Tice (circa: 2003), Leslie Frazier dons his former Bears' #21 and full-on pads during the entirety of the Vikings' December 20th game versus Chicago.

5.  "Jackson-to-Rice" replaces "Montana/Young-to Rice" in the national football lexicon.

6.  Both Leslie Frazier and Zygmunt "Zygi" Wilf -- seeking hard-ass monikers more reflective of their sport -- change their pronames to "Mitch" and "Lou," respectively.

7.  Jared Allen rediscovers his offensive form of 2007 (when he scored two touchdowns) and concludes the season with more TD's than sacks.

8.  In need of a desperate, Week 17 win to perhaps claim the last playoff slot, the 8-7 Vikings fire undefeated interim head Leslie Frazier and re-hire Brad Childress to provide the team one final rush of needed adrenaline.

9.  Toby Gerhart reveals he's no longer comfortable being a token, white running back, coverts to being a Muslim and changes his name to "Babar" (meaning: "Lion hearted, brave, courageous and exemplary leadership qualities. Highly, powerful and influential, very charismatic and bold with splendor and positive radiance").

10.  Or -- this team manages a 6-0 run under Leslie Frazier and somehow makes the playoffs as the final Wild Card entrant.

 


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