Report: Michele Bachmann isn't Jewish

Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney: Neither of these people is Jewish.

​From the "You're joking, right?" files comes a strange report in the New York Post that one of the most strident Evangelical Christians in America is being mistaken by some New Yorkers as a fellow Jew.

Oy vey.

According to the story, Michele Bachmann's name and her fierce support of Israel are confusing some Jewish folks, who have drifted away from supporting Mitt Romney -- what with all the Mormonism -- in favor of a nice Jewish girl like Michele.

Bachmann's spokespeople said they were unaware of the phenomenon. Then again, Bachmann has made repeated statements about her religion that, taken on their face, could really confuse someone who didn't know any better.

Admittedly, the Post -- which has a somewhat tenuous relationship with reality -- has only a single source in its story. A Mitt Romney fundraiser cites the confusion, but does so with exasperation, saying, "It's a real problem."

Now, why would anyone think Bachmann's a member of the tribe? Maybe because says she is.

Michele Bachmann trying to say "chutzpah."

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In an interview last year with the website TCJewFolk, Bachmann gave her weird thoughts on supporting Israel.

I am honored to be in a position where I can help Israel. I have a tremendous love for Israel, and great admiration for the Israeli people. I am a Christian, but I consider my heritage Jewish, because it is the foundation, the roots of my faith as a Christian.

She does have sort of a point there, in the sense that Christianity followed on to Judaism. In that case, Bachmann is also a Catholic, because Lutheranism grew out of Catholicism, and she's a Muslim, because that followed Christianity.

Oh, snap! By that same logic, she's also a Mormon, just like Mitt Romney!

We all know that Michele has great command of Yiddish -- recall her perfect use and pronunciation of "chutzpah" -- but beyond that, she also seems to really, really love Israel. According congress-tracking website Legistorm, Bachmann and her family have gotten all-expenses trips to Israel several times in the past.

In 2008, Bachmann ran up $7,170 in a trip to Jerusalem, with the Jewish Community Relations Foundation picking up the whole tab. Two more trips, in 2007 and 2009, were paid for by the American Israel Education Foundation to the tune of more than $37,000 total.

This year, Bachmann got a free trip to Palm Beach, Florida courtesy of the David Horowitz Freedom Foundation, which is mostly concerned about the "freedom" to say pretty offensive stuff about Muslims: On it's "Bookstore" page, you can order "Stealth Jihad: How Radical Islam is Subverting America Without Guns or Bombs," or "Religion of Peace? Why Chrisianity Is and Islam Isn't." Freedom!

So, there you go, Jewish people. Michele Bachmann really, really wants to be a member of the tribe, and some of your own are starting to believe her.

Mazel tov, Michele.


Related:

• Michele Bachmann tries, fails to say the word "chutzpah"
• Bachmanns quit church they hadn't been to in two years
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