semen-eating article triggers Rightwing backlash

Categories: Media beefs, Sex
Vita.Mn: May contain semen
Be very, very careful when you're reading a sex column. You might accidentally read something about sex.

That's the lesson "True North," a local conservative blog, is attempting to teach readers after one writer was scandalized by what he read in Vita.MN's last issue.

The question posed is not for the faint of heart, or stomach. But True North writer "Ism" was so offended she's trying to start a campaign to get banned from every grocery store and restaurant in town.

Good luck with that.

Just for context, here's the question that Alexis McKinnis of "Alexis on the Sexes" took on.

Q: Is it weird that a straight guy likes his own cum? I prefer to share it with a girl (lick it off her, etc.), but even when I masturbate I just like to cum in my own mouth or just lick it off my fingers.
Alexis wasn't squeamish about the question, but one guy was.
So, right, there's that. Alexis's answer starts off by announcing that she's never, in five years, fielded that question. But don't worry, questioner: It's not "weird," at all, according to Alexis, who explains, "the practice of a man ingesting his own semen is actually fairly normal among the sexually adventurous set."

After running through a few of the various occasions and methods in which such a thing might be done, Alexis turns to the environmental issue. Twin Cities residents are always concerned about saving the earth, and it seems consumption of one's own fluids is an oft-overlooked way to help conserve:

"Plus, you're saving trees, water and energy by not using Kleenex or running that hand towel through the wash an extra time."
So, it's not weird, it's safe, and it's the sexual equivalent of picking up litter. Everyone wins, right?

Wrong, says "Ism," of True North, who writes that she was schocked to find out what was actually inside Vita.MN after taking it off the rack.

This publication is free. Any 15 year old who is bored or any 80 year old woman waiting for her food to arrive has access to this filth. There is no disclaimer on the front of the publication which warns about explicit content, and, in fact, appears to the average person to simply be a paper filled with "what's happening in the Twin Cities" type of information.
Well, Ism, now you know what's happening in the Twin Cities: Guys are eating their own semen.

Ism said she took the column to the restaurant manager, and she, too, was "appalled." According to Ism, the manager immediately collected all the issues still on the rack and threw them all out. At that point, Ism's crusade took her to other nearby businesses that carry Vita.MN, where she confronted managers with the "Alexis on the Sexes" item.

Se wants every other like-minded upstanding citizen to do the same, and force businesses to pull from the racks.

"As citizens," Ism write, "it's important for us to call attention when the Left creeps into our communities and spreads their warped agenda onto our unsuspecting children and elderly."

Let's just hope she never hears about Savage Love.

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"As citizens," Ism write, "it's important for us to call attention when the Left creeps into our communities and spreads their warped agenda onto our unsuspecting children and elderly."Dude, the elderly figured this sex thing out a long time ago. Turns out, they've actually been having sex way longer than the rest of us, and kink wasn't invented within the last couple decades. Folks have been into all kinds of things since the dawn of time, and we don't have to worry about corrupting the pure, innocent minds of the elderly by daring to write about sexytimes activities in a publication they might be at risk of reading. How patronizing.

Michelle Bachmann
Michelle Bachmann

Can anyone else picture this wild eyed maniac going from business to business bursting in the door screaming "YOU HAVE PORNO OH THE CHILDREN MEN EATING CUM? NO PLEASE THROW OUT THE VITA OH GOD THEY HURT ISM ME NO LIKE PLEASE HELP"   She then collapses to the floor sobbing, a wreck.   Suddenly her body seems to be jolted to life as she lunges towards a rack of Vita.MN screaming a primal scream.   Just then the orderlies from then mental hospital burst in, tackle her, and sedate her.   The kind business owner pretends to remove Vita.MN from the shelves to soothe her damaged mind as she is dragged towards the van that will take her back to the loony bin.  The good news is I think the Republicans have found their wild eyed maniac to run for Congress to replace  a certain wild eyed maniac that is running for President.   Bachmann/Nugent 2012!


Ism = Jizzum


Apparently the right-wingers missed the other issues where she constantly promotes watching pornography and dismissed the harms that befall the women of the sex industry.


Sounds like 'Ism' has never watched that ground-breaking indie film "Clerks"!

 VERONICABye(to DANTE)That was Snowball.DANTEWhy do you call him that?VERONICASylvan made it up. It's a blow jobthing.DANTEWhat do you mean?VERONICAAfter he gets a blow job, he likesto have the cum spit back into hismouth while kissing. It's calledsnowballing.DANTEHe requested this?VERONICAHe gets off on it.But, too be fair, that was only 17 years ago.  It takes about 40 for cultural impact to make it into the rightwing-osphere.

BTW: Alexis? Oh, yes-kis!

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