This winter is going to be horrible

Categories: Weather, Winter
snowy car.jpg
Remember how much fun we had last year?
It's practically summer outside today and the temperature is threatening to break the 132-year-old record high of 87 degrees.

So what better time to let everyone know that this winter is going to completely suck?

This morning, the website AccuWeather released its winter forecast predictions, which basically confirm all of our angst-y fall fears.

AccuWeather meteorologists used a couple of indicators to make their predictions, including arctic sea ice levels and the behavior of the Pacific sea storm, La Niña. The storm's equatorial winds will start picking up strength, sending a blast of icy weather straight up the Midwest's skirts.

"During La Niñas we tilt toward colder winters here in the upper Midwest," says Greg Spoden, a climatologist with the Department of Natural Resources. "It's not a lock, but the odds are tilted that way."

car window snow 3186982854_ab370a8dc6.jpg
This is how you will get this winter's forecast.

Paul Walker, a senior meteorologist with AccuWeather says December and early January are going to be the worst, with temperatures dropping several degrees below the average for that time of year. Typical temperatures around that time are a high of freezing and lows in the teens. As La Niña cools her jets in mid-January, things should get at least back up to those average -- but still bitter -- temps.

As for snowfall, Walker predicts that we will likely avoid another Snowmageddon like we got last year, but it will still be an above-average year for snow -- about 56 inches or so, which is downright tame compared to the insane 87 inches we got last winter.

But snow news is bad news, so make the most of a day like today, Blizzard People. We all know what comes next.


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9 comments
Tim Bates
Tim Bates

There is a special place in hell for you reminders of things to come.

David Foureyes
David Foureyes

It's Minnesota...every winter is horrible...which is AWESOME, holds the pussies at bay.

Bianca
Bianca

I'll be the first to recognize and praise the ingenious title of this article.

vitajex
vitajex

"Paul Walker, a senior meteorologist with AccuWeather says..."

Pfft!  Like I'm gonna listen to a guy who was in "2 Fast 2 Furious".

AJ
AJ

So fucking glad I moved away from that hellhole

Guy
Guy

Bring it, Jesus!

Albatross
Albatross

GOOD!  The cold weather gets rid of the easy-living riffraff! Get back to Arizona and Florida!  Yeah, I'm lookin' at YOU grandma!

Albatross
Albatross

Wimp!  We don't need your kind up here!  G'wan, run away to warmer climates!

BTW, d'you have a room available, say, in January and February?

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