Kim Kardashian divorced Kris Humphries over... Minnesota?

Categories: Media beefs
kardashian humphries.jpg
Kim Kardashian, Kris Humphries: Divorced because of Minnesota?
Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries' fairytale romance -- okay, made-for-TV-movie romance -- came to a quick, tragic end yesterday.

As the ink dries on the divorce papers, and Americans attempt to pick up the pieces of their shattered lives, everyone's speculating on just what it was that made these two grow "irreconcilable differences" between late August and Halloween.

At the moment, the leading theory is... it's our fault. You see, Minnesota, Kris Humphries likes living here, and wanted to bring Kim back and make her our princess.

But Kim pretty much hates it here. Depending on who you ask, this might be the greatest endorsement the state of Minnesota has gotten in years.

Kim already made it clear she didn't think much of our state, which she referred to as "Yeehaw Minnesota,"; she imagined this land to be populated only by cowboys and... their cows. But this revelation that the Land of 10,000 Lakes may have driven an impassable wedge between these star-crossed lovers is a new low in Minnesota hatred.

kim kardashian.jpg
Kim Kardashian doesn't care for Minnesota, which doesn't care right back.
People magazine reports that in the preview for the next "Keeping Up With the Kardashians," Kim takes a shot at our state which gives shape to the crux of their problems.

"How," Kim asks, "am I going to have my career and live in Minnesota?"

Reached for comment, Minnesota said, "Oh my God, this is terrible! Wait...she has a career?"

As usual, Kris had a comeback for Kim, which People has duly made note of for posterity.

"Baby, by the time you have kids and they're in school, no one will care about you," Humphries said.

The "blame Minnesota theory" has been picked up, in part, by TMZ.com, which has been writing a constant stream of "leaked" "information" about the death of American romance. But TMZ also writes that Kim's disdain for Minnesota was less of a factor than Kris' love of the spotlight.

Kim's "friends" (publicist) told TMZ that Kris wanted to live the Hollywood life, and was all about "chasing fame," reporting that he hired an L.A. publicist over the weekend to work on his image after the divorce. Meanwhile, US Weekly...

Okay, now we're bored. Anyway, you get the point. America is crying into its Halloween candy, and cursing Minnesota this morning.

We regret nothing.

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56 comments
KCMNGuy
KCMNGuy

Well, for once, I am not going to keep my 'Minnesota nice'... GOOD! We don't need this type of stuff here in MN. Over-aged valley girls do not belong. Our girls grow out of this stuff by the time they are old enough to drive.

DK
DK

Yah if you spend time in Minnesota you may just stay married 45 or so years.  Hollywood 2-4 is the norm.  Maybe Kim knew Minnesotians would hold her to a higher standard than Hollywood? 

Moresheth-gath
Moresheth-gath

Minnesota is a beautiful state!  I am not from there and I don't live there, but I travel thrugh every few years.  It truly is a wonderful, down the earth place.  I am sadded that the Kardashian family (and there was more than one who made insulting comments ON THEIR  show against Minn.)  has sunk so low to try to slander the guy by making indferences that he is sleezy and fame seeking. Obviously that is what Kim, Courtney and Kris Jenner have been doing for the past few years.) Khloe is the only adult  female member of that family that isn't a fame whoremonger

 As far as his come back remark, everyone knows that he was right, especially in the lime light people come and go.  Beside that, if she and her manager are the business women they want the public to think, they could have established something without loosing HER career. .It only would have evoled.  ... And Minnesota didn't have to be a permenant residence.   I am very angered at the arrogance of some of the Kardashian women.  We get it, the public gets it, every where else in this United State is shit except where their feet decide to tread.    

Indyaan28
Indyaan28

please people lets stop talking about the kardashians in hope's that they will go away forever. no more making this talent less family money.

guest
guest

If Kim Kardashian doesn't appreciate a great state like Minnesota, then she doesn't deserve to live there anyways. At least Kendra Wilkinson-Baskett went there and gave it a shot even though she's lived in Cali her whole life. Even when her baby's party got completely snowed out on her TV show, she still didn't bash the entire state of MN. Instead she just had fun with it. Her career isn't over just because she stepped foot in MN. Kim needs to get real and grow up.

AbleCynic
AbleCynic

I have only been to Minnesota a few times, but all of the women I saw in Minnesota look better than Kim Kardashian.

Boola519
Boola519

that boy has a solid head on his shoulders, MN should be PROUD of him!!

Birdsong
Birdsong

And they claim gays would ruin the sanctity of marriage? Really?

Allie
Allie

She can take her fake everything back to Hollywood.

Charlenegannon
Charlenegannon

Oh who did not know this was not going to work? Kim was put off by having to let kris in the loop and allow him some say so about the planning of the wedding. Kris that should of been your que to run like hell...Kim ya better wake up or you are going to be old and lonely. Marriage is a huge commitment not to be taken lightly as Kim you have. Oh follow my heart as my dad says you say. How can you get married and take it so lightly? What a sham how can you even look at yourself in the mirror? I did not think it was going to be this and so i want a divorce real life is not your reality show oh well maybe it is to you!

Lizz B.
Lizz B.

I just wanna note that when you tally up all the pages views this article has, mine doesn't count. I didn't read it. I just copied "Kris Humphries" from the headline for a joke on twitter. That is all. Carry on...

Tennillen Jackson
Tennillen Jackson

First off don't judge what u don't know and two when u get married its not bout u its bout both of u. If u knew u didn't want to come here and didn't want the same as he did what the help u marry him for? U made a complete fool out of him and u. Not just that all that money for 72 days. U are selfish and are a prime. Reason why men think all women are gold diggers. Get it together

Prime Grans
Prime Grans

I guess I'll have to boycott the Kardashian's show, because guess what? I am proud of being from Minnesota and everything we have here, honest, faithful, kind and loving people. We don't have to make up a TV show about our pathetic life and sell our soul for a "career". 

Elliee
Elliee

I am 59 years old and have dealt with  boys and men from Minnesota all my life. I do not find Chris's stupid comment about Kim as anything unusual coming out of the mouth of a Minnesota guy.This is what you would hear from guys from Minnesota.Men from Minnesota like nothing better than to degrade a woman even though, and mostly because, she has a better education  than he could ever hope to achieve.Aside from Chris's "scholarship" for physical accomplishment(basketball,football,baseball,etc.) meaning that he is physically capable of putting a ball in a hole somewhere and I would hope that is the one thing he has going for him. However--after only 72 days of marriage-I can only guess that Chris can't get even the right ball in the right hole--He certainly is no intellect --what can he and Kim possibly have to talk about! End of marriage!!! I am only surprised it got as far as marriage before Kim realized she is far to intelligent and upscale for him. The only way Chris makes himself feel better is by putting other people down and trying to make them feel worthless, Just think about some of the things he said to Kim. Really nasty for no reason! Chris is a JACK-ASS and he deserves to be alone!

PowderedDonuts
PowderedDonuts

It's easy... do not support these people.  They're a perfect example of American greed and the dumbing down of society.  Unfortunately people buy these idiots products and watch their shows and the money keeps flowing in.  You're to blame!  And shut up with your religious views weirdos.

Tim Knaak
Tim Knaak

what a waste of time. who cares

Jenn
Jenn

As a Minnesotan, I happen to be glad the Kar-trashian clan won't be trying to take over our state.

However, how is it that a heterosexual couple can be married 72 days and get a divorce and homosexual couples that have been together for years or even decades can't be married? Doesn't this seem a little wrong??

EK
EK

Doesn't she know that we have more bike lanes per capita than Hollywood?

Forwardpride
Forwardpride

Inevitable result; they both married beneath them.

Shadybell_46
Shadybell_46

Stupid spoiled rich bitch! minnesota doesnt want you here anyways we are too classy for people like you! Go back to cali and focus on your "career" while you still have it cuz you will be washed up and a nobody in about 5 years!

Dman
Dman

I said it before and I'll say it again...whore.

Kim'sbigol'boo-tay
Kim'sbigol'boo-tay

Nobody cares what that $2 trick thinks of our great state! To know our state is to love it, obviously she knows nothing about REAL good people!

ludwigtr
ludwigtr

...who the hell is this person and why am I supposed to care about her?

Angie
Angie

Great I'm glad we didn't get a Kardashian. We only produce people with talent, and you honestly don't have any. I had never heard of 'The Kardashians' until you came out with a reality show? Ha. Some "life" you have. Hollywood isn't everything. There are plenty of things to start or get involved in in the midwest. And you, being the dumb-shallow-self absorbed celebrity you are, are just not able to see that. Gross. Minnesota doesn't want that type of person in our state anyway.

ETK
ETK

"But Kim pretty much hates it here. Depending on who you ask, this might be the greatest endorsement the state of Minnesota has gotten in years." NO KIDDING! I SAY HALLELUJAH!

Kara Black
Kara Black

...and Minnesota hates you Kim Kardashian.

TFerguson
TFerguson

kris and kim are poster children for why we need the marriage amendment and prevention of all same-sex marriages in the US. To have the gall to call off the marriage on JesusWeen demonstrates how disrespectful same-sex couples are to their lord and savior. Hopefully some counseling sessions from Marcus Bachmann can pray away their lesbianism and both of them can evolve into positive role mothers within traditional heterosexual marriages.

Djg856
Djg856

That's awhole nother topic! :) 

chipper
chipper

KHRIS HUMPHRIES IS NOT A JACK ASS. Your sick comments are just that SICK

Djg856
Djg856

Hilarious comments!!! lmaooooooo...of course we'd like to know his background! Does jaded, maybe dumped for a guy in MN sound more like it? Who knows....???  Hes definitely got an ax to grind!  Whewwww....

Krambones
Krambones

Kim Kardashian didn't graduate from college. Kris Humphries speaks very well. Kris was right---Kim is not Merle Streep or Sandra Bullock. THEY are talented. What "career" is this idjut beeatch talking about.

As far as fame chasing--Kris Humphries was already famous he plays professional basketball. Elliee you are an idjut.

Noone
Noone

Wait....You think Kim is...intelligent?

Dhollie86
Dhollie86

I don't think it's us Minnesota guys that are the problem. You are 59 years old and haven't found a good guy?! I'm sorry to say it and I'm not trying to be mean, but I think that has something to do with or say about yourself.

Hanifa
Hanifa

Elliee, dislike:(

guest
guest

This comment sounds incredibly pressed. There are many incredible Minnesotan men and unless you know Chris personally, I don't think you have a right to say such things. 

Lisa
Lisa

and where are you from that you can  stereotype minnesota men? obviously not minnesota. and she chose to marry the idiot so its not all his fault. we all know they both did it for publicity and money. she isnt any smarter than any other hollywood nobody witha tv show. 

Djg856
Djg856

You're talking apples, oranges....2 entirely different things. You're generalizing about 2 different groups Jenn. Not all homosexuals stay together for years or decades just as heteros don't. It's their choice. 

guest
guest

Yeah, we're so classy that we spell "cuz" and call people bitches. 

Hanifa
Hanifa

Angie, this just made me laugh! and true lool

Tom
Tom

Tell me, how does a heterosexual couples divorce have any bearing on same-sex marriage? If anything, this proves that unfit couples and parents can be found anywhere in America, not just in same-sex relationships. If you're really interested in following the ancient laws set in place in the Old Testament, be prepared to stop eating shellfish and wearing clothing woven from more than one fabric. Leviticus says that those are abominations unto the lord as well. Maybe you should follow the New Testament's advice: "Judge not, lest ye be judged." The bible makes it pretty clear that we are not fit to judge one another. This is God's place.

Djg856
Djg856

I agree....they both have money....she is definitely extremely shallow, enamored with herself....and so enmeshed with her family of origin...especially surprising at her age and being the oldest!  Birds of a feather flock together...I say both are immature in many ways, though I can't say I know as much about him. Nothing is good enough for her...and its Alllllllllll about HER, if you've ever seen their show. 

Kenzie
Kenzie

 I agree. I have lived all over the world and I think Minnesota men are just dolls. I'm proud to be from there.

Ang
Ang

I second that....  Also take one or two seconds out of your day and spell out 'California' instead of 'Cali'..  who do you think you are LL Cool J?

I feel bad for them both, they rushed into a situation because they had all this money thrown at them to get married on TV, then the NBA lock out happened and I am sorry but no matter how secure a guy says he is in his 'manhood', I have yet to meet one guy who is not just slightly jealous or threatned when their wife/girlfriend is more successful with them. 

guest
guest

I feel like it's pretty clear that this comment is a joke, and a funny one at that. You people need to calm down.

TFerguson
TFerguson

its pretty clear by their names, that Kris and Kim are a lesbian couple. my pentium II and dial-up won't display photos; but based on the reported extravagance of their brief marriage, they need to come back to Minnesota for a visit with Mac Hammond. The prosperity gospel applies only to heterosexual mates, so hopefully they each can find a suitable males at Lord Felcher's.

gideon
gideon

If your wife / girlfriend is richer than you, trust me, you can keep her. All it takes is good sex with her, and she ain't leaving. This woman did not get the sex satisfaction that she is craving for. It is not about Minnesota. The truth will come out in the end!

Djg856
Djg856

That doesn't even make sense! lolol  

Rockstar786
Rockstar786

Have you been living under a rock? Kim Kardashian is a WOMAN and Kris Humphries is a MAN. Wow....another ignorant bible thumper.

Lisa
Lisa

his full name is Kristian. you are dumb> if people wanted to marry their dog you would probably be ok it with that and not same sex marriage. why is it any ones business who someone wants to marry? this is supposed to be a free counrty isnt it?

TFerguson
TFerguson

we can assume that which is capable of proof: Jesus' dad is quoted in the Bible "men shall be named Chris, with a C-H; and women, Kris with a K". California should know better, they still have prop 8 in place.

Tom
Tom

Well, you know what they say about assuming...

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