Legendary North Dakota: Top 8 Reasons No-Dak Is So Damn Sexy!
|North Dakota has a bar and three women. Legendary.|
But that's not the only thing Legendary about North Dakota. You don't get a nationwide reputation as The Sexiest State in the Union™ just by rounding up three trollops in pastel dresses willing to stand outside the window of the only beer garden in town.
Which is why the North Dakota Tourism Board has taken the logical next step in its marketing campaign and released this list of the sexiest, most erotic -- dare we say, "Legendary?" -- sights to see in North Dakota.
8. Men From No-Dak Go Tanning in Banana Hammocks
Forget Jersey Shore, North Dakotans are the masters of GTL, as this sign in Jamestown, ND, makes clear. Just look at the blue banana hammock on that buff No-Dak stud, who is clearly about to get freaky from behind with a J-Woww lookalike. Indeed, this may be the most "legendary" tanning sign on the Internet. Just one piece of advice: if you plan to visit in January, you might want to bundle up a bit more, lest you end up with a frozen banana.
7. Candy is Dandy, But Liquor is Quicker
Lookin' for a party? The No-Daks know how to have a legendarily good time. So legendary, in fact, that it lands them in jail more often than anywhere else in country. According to the CDC, North Dakota leads the nation in number of DUI arrests. They've also got the rest of the union beat in rates of binge and underage drinking. Maybe averaging five drinks or more in one sitting is considered legendary in Connecticut -- in North Dakota, that's called Tuesday.
6. In North Dakota, It's Always Raining Men
Sex in the City? How about Sex in the Corn Field! When Cosmo recently went looking for eligible bachelors, it found some No-Dak hunks. There's Jesse Regan, who likes when you call him with your problems and--according to his ex--still needs some work. Or Andy DeGidio, who says about himself: "I'm not the craziest guy out there, but I'm not the most reserved." No wonder he's so Legendary!