If there was ever a time to have a pack of Oreos in your car...

Not crying over spilled milk is sound advice -- but if we're talking about thousands and thousands of gallons?

SEE ALSO: Firefighters battle flames in drag [VIDEO]

Footage released by the Minnesota State Patrol shows a tidal wave of milk gushing into the Lowry Hill Tunnel moments after a milk tanker overturned Tuesday afternoon.

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Image by Tatiana Craine

Don't love it while behind the wheel, kids.

A driver recently spotted swerving his car erratically on Greeley Street in Stillwater wasn't drunk, high, or on bath salts. But he was under the influence -- of Ronald McDonald.

SEE ALSO:
-- Hamburglar lives! Bag of McDonald's swiped from unsuspecting customer
-- Vikings' Jerome Felton, arrested for DWI in McDonald's drive-thru, was lovin' it too much

After an officer watched a truck cross the centerline, a 19-year-old Oakdale man told police he was all over the road because he was preoccupied chowing McDonald's.

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Who needs Metro Transit police when you have Shawn Daivari?

Metro Transit has released surveillance footage of former WWE wrestler Shawn Daivari choking out a belligerent passenger during a southbound trip on the Hiawatha Line a few weeks back.

SEE ALSO:
-- Shawn Daivari, former WWE star, chokes out belligerent racist on Hiawatha Line
-- Metro Transit responds to security concerns following Shawn Daivari incident

Though the footage doesn't have sound, it appears to show that the incident unfolded just as we've previously reported. An unruly passenger gives a bicyclist a hard time when he boards the train, then appears to turn his ire to another off-camera rider. As the man prepares to initiate a physical altercation with the off-camera rider, Daivari springs out of his seat, takes his jacket off, and chokes the troublemaker out.

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Daivari's Hiawatha Line smackdown isn't reflective of security problems on Metro Transit trains, a spokesman said.

A couple weeks ago, former WWE star Shawn Daivari choked out a belligerent passenger while riding on the Hiawatha Line to the airport.

SEE ALSO:
-- Shawn Daivari, former WWE star, chokes out belligerent racist on Hiawatha Line

Daivari said numerous people on the train hit the train's emergency help button when the disturbance began, but at the next stop, "nobody got on the train, so we knew there were no cops waiting to get on and help."

That characterization of the incident raised concerns about security on Hiawatha Line trains, but in an interview with City Pages, Metro Transit's PR manager, John Siqveland, gave a slightly different account of the incident and said officials handled the on-train smackdown the best they could.


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Bus singalongs FTW.

Earbuds are great, but something's lost when everyone is locked into their own personal audio bubble.

SEE ALSO: Shawn Daivari, former WWE star, chokes out belligerent racist on Hiawatha Line

Spontaneous bus singalongs, for example.

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Kadlec allegedly shot a biker in the face during a road rage incident.

God forbid you encounter 71-year-old Cambridge resident Joseph Kadlec when he's behind the wheel, but if you do, don't try and pass him.

SEE ALSO: In span of hour, two elderly Stillwater drivers accidentally hit gas pedal, cause separate wrecks

Kadlec has been involved in six road rage incidents since 2008, and the worst one occurred last Saturday afternoon when he allegedly shot a motorcyclist in the face right outside the Isanti Police Department headquarters.

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shawndaivari.com

Daivari on why he went with a choke hold: "They were using the Figure-Four in car one, and I didn't want to steal their finisher."

Think wrestling is fake? That might be news to the belligerent racist dude who got choked out by Shawn Daivari on the Hiawatha Line train yesterday.

SEE ALSO: Brock Lesnar makes kickass return to pro wrestling on WWE Monday Night Raw [VIDEO]

Daivari, a 28-year-old former WWE superstar who was born in Minneapolis, says he was headed to the airport after visiting family when a big fat guy started harassing passengers on the train. After one of the riders was threatened with death, Daivari sprang into action and subdued him with a choke hold/body scissors combo.

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Wutschke is allegedly Minnesota's most perverted distracted driver.

SEE ALSO:
-- St. Paul has the safest drivers in the country, new study finds
-- Edina drunk driver refuses to put down burrito, offers bribe, blows .284, flips bird during mug
-- Bryan Hathaway, Duluth-area dead deer sexer, allegedly assaults officer at Wal Mart

Dead-deer ditch sex, holding up traffic because you're too preoccupied pleasuring a sex toy to drive... human sexuality is a complex thing, people.

Yesterday, Brian Wutschke, a 45-year-old Farmington resident, was arrested after police responded to reports of a man driving down University Ave. while sucking on a sex toy. The police call was made by a woman who witnessed Wutschke's strange sexy show while she was waiting at the University and Marion bus stop in St. Paul.


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This is just the beginning of the massive trail of litter.

If you've driven on 35W in the past few hours, you undoubtedly noticed the thousands of white papers strewn along the sides of the highway as it approaches Minneapolis.

At first, it looks like perhaps a protester tossed a box of leaflets off the pedestrian bridge. But then the litter goes on for so  long that it becomes clear that it must have come streaming out of a truck.

We pulled over to the side of the highway to pick up some of the documents and see what they were. It turns out they are some kind of store receipts (from a vendor?). Take a look at these photos and let us know in the comments if you have any theories.

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Compared to 2010, there was a lot less of this happening in Mpls last year.

Compared to 2010, Twin Cities commuters breathed a lot easier last year.

According to the 2011 U.S. Traffic Scorecard, Minneapolis (really, the Twin Cities metro) had the biggest decrease in traffic congestion from 2010 through 2011.

The scorecard uses traffic information from more than four million vehicles equipped with GPS devices in compiling the annual list of the most- and least-frustrating places to drive in America.

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