David Collier and Courtney Archer Wrecked Two Cop Cars in Wild Police Chase

Olmsted County
We have an early front-runner for craziest police chase of the year

A man who works in the auto body department at the Viking Lupient car dealership in Rochester recognized a red Ford pickup truck while driving home March 18.

He knew that truck, because he repainted it before it was stolen off the lot earlier in the week. The man followed the truck as it left the Cenex gas station in Oronoco and called the cops.

See also: Thomas Fuselier Lost Cops in Car Chase, Captured When Fence Snags Fake Leg

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Minnesota Awarded Major League Soccer Franchise -- As Long as New Stadium Is Built

Szapucki via Flickr
The New York Red Bulls' stadium on its opening night

Major League Soccer is coming to Minnesota. The jubilant atmosphere at yesterday's announcement at Target Field and statewide celebration of another major professional sports franchise slated to debut in 2018 proved soccer has come a long way in Minnesota.

Before the celebration was even over, however, MLS Commissioner Don Garber issued a not-so-subtle ultimatum: Get a stadium deal in place by July or we'll take our business elsewhere.

See also:
Bill McGuire Joins Zygi Wilf as Next Shady Businessman to Own MN Sports Team

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MNGOP's Ill-Fated, $150,000 "Give It Back!" Campaign Is Officially Dead

Categories: LOLGOP

Screenshot of MNGOP on YouTube
Turns out Republicans couldn't resist spending the surplus

State GOP Chair Keith Downey spent $150,000 trying to rally the troops around his "Give it Back!" campaign, urging politicians to send the state's entire $2 billion surplus back to taxpayers in the form of rebate checks.

"Democrat politicians overcharged Minnesota taxpayers by nearly $2 billion," says Downey, starring in his own expensive commercial despite not being able to pay vendors from the last election. "Democrats can keep it, spend it or send our fair share back. The Republican Party of Minnesota says send it back. Send it all back."

See also:
More Than $1 Million in Debt, GOP Spends $150,000 on New Ad Campaign

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Bill McGuire Joins Zygi Wilf As Next Shady Businessman to Own MN Pro Sports Team

Categories: Crime, Sports

Screenshot of Voice Media Group video
He had to pay back nearly $500 million in shady stock options and is still banned from running a public company

Today Major League Soccer is expected to announce it's awarding a new franchise to an ownership group led by a man whose prior corporate misconduct was bad enough to get him banned from running a public company for 10 years.

Former UnitedHealth Group CEO Bill McGuire saved professional soccer in the state when he bought the Minnesota Stars in 2012 and has used his personal fortune for a number of worthy charitable causes, like creating a scholarship fund at the U of M, and donating land for Gold Medal Park downtown. But let's not forget he became the poster child for shady CEO payouts and outrageous golden parachutes after he resigned from UnitedHealth in disgrace in 2006.

See also:
Bill McGuire Buys Minnesota Stars

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Darnell Carlton, Academy Award-Winning Rapper, Now a Fugitive in Domestic Incident

Categories: Crime, Outstate MN

Stearns County Jail
Darnell "Crunchy Black" Carlton is on the lam after failing to appear for a November court date.

The past 12 months have been a rough go for hip-hop star Darnell Lorenzo Carlton, better known by his stage name "Crunchy Black."

Last March, the 40-year-old rapper and former member of the Oscar-winning rap group Three 6 Mafia was arrested for cocaine possession and domestic assault after allegedly beating his fiancee inside a St. Cloud hotel room.

Now he's wanted man.

See also:
Fugitive Ty Hoffman, suspect in Kelly Phillips murder, allegedly robbed Blaine bank

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U of M's Tone on Dan Markingson Changes Drastically After Legislative Auditor's Report

Categories: U of M

Mary Weiss
Dan Markingson and his mother, Mary Weiss, who suffered a series of strokes after his death that left her disabled.

The University of Minnesota's steely defense of its human research program is finally unraveling after the Office of the Legislative Auditor released a lengthy roast of the University's treatment of a drug study subject more than a decade ago.

Following that report, the U voluntarily suspended recruitment for the Department of Psychiatry's ongoing projects.

See also:
U of M's Human Experimentation Program Hasn't Learned Much from Dan Markingson's Suicide

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Parking Meter App Initially Approved by Minneapolis, Trial Planned For Spring

Ben Johnson
Just look at those people, lined up waiting to pay for parking like savages

Yesterday a Minneapolis City Council committee raised no objections to using a new app to pay for street parking in Minneapolis, paving the way for a trial run involving about 500 of the city's 7,500 metered parking spaces later this spring.

If the trial run goes well, by the time summer's over people in Minneapolis will no longer have to deal with the city's mildly irritating rectangular payment boxes.

See also:
Soon You May Be Able to Pay For Street Parking From Your Phone in Minneapolis

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Police Say Father "Not Truthful" After 10-Year-Old Barway Collins's Disappearance

Categories: Sad

Crystal Police
He was last seen leaving the school bus at the 5400 block of Douglas Drive North

Barway Collins was last seen leaving a school transportation van March 18.

A surveillance video released by Crystal police yesterday shows 10-year-old Collins telling a friend "there's my dad" and shortly after he says, "oh, my uncle's here" while unbuckling his seat belt.

See also:
Carlos Orozco's Abduction First Time Cell Phone Amber Alert Led Directly to Successful Recovery

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The Real Homeless of Wayzata High

Categories: Longform

Emily Utne

Crystal wears her anxiety like an allergy. As she stands at the edge of the Wayzata High School cafeteria, scanning a chattering sea of unfamiliar faces, she can feel pools of heat flaring up her cheeks and down her neck.

She sifts through the North Face jackets and twinkling iPads for a place to squeeze in, hypersensitive to the sideways glances at her purple pixie hair. It's obvious she doesn't belong.

But one table calls to her, a table of asymmetrical haircuts and Doc Martens. A girl seems to beckon with a curious eye. Crystal smiles back nervously. She's found the outcasts of Wayzata.

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Convicted Cop Killer Brian Fitch Would Like His $3,000 Back

Categories: Crime

Ramsey County
Fitch was caught with a day's worth of drug money, and he wants it back

Brian Fitch maintains he was simply a busy drug dealer collecting money on the day he was arrested for murdering Mendota Heights police officer Scott Patrick.

Fitch had $2,993.43 in cash on him when he was captured after a shootout with police in a parking lot in West St. Paul, which law enforcement seized as evidence.

See also:
Brian Fitch Yells Obscenities at Judge After Being Found Guilty of Murdering Cop

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