The U of M ranked 20th overall in spending on college sports.

​Talk about getting little on-field bang for the buck.

A Memphis Business Journal analysis indicates that during the 2010-11 academic year, the University of Minnesota spent $17 million on its football program -- the 36th most out of any school in the country and the ninth-most in the Big Ten. That season, which was the last in the disastrous tenure of coach Tim Brewster, the team went 3-9.

In other words, the U of M spent over $5 million per football win. But despite disappointing on-field results year in and year out, the football program is a huge money-maker for the school -- an analysis by The Business of College Sports found that the U of M made $16.5 million from football in 2009-10.

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The guard in the pink jacket tried to fight... pretty much everyone.

​The University of Minnesota football team actually won a big game on Saturday, stealing a late win over a pretty decent University of Iowa team.

As the seconds counted down on the 22-21 comeback victory, Minnesota students, finally having something to celebrate about, rushed the field to join the team in its moment of glory.

Not everyone was so happy. One TCF Bank Stadium guard took it upon himself to stop the field-crashing kids. When that proved hopeless, he just started tripping and shoving anyone that came near him.

The guard's party-pooping behavior, as caught on videos since uploaded to Youtube, were so egregious that he's now been fired.
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Maybe you shouldn't have sex in this place, and with these people.

​The University of Minnesota has taken a dramatic drop in sex practices from last year, according to a national study on student sexual health. All of those people who graduated last spring may take a moment to pat themselves on the back.

And you incoming freshmen? Maybe you should consider taking a shower. No, not all at once, you perverts!

The findings, released in the annual Trojan Sexual Health Report Card, shows the U falling from 10th in healthy sex practices all the way down to 68th.

The report, which judges schools on 13 different categories including access to condoms and birth control pills, and student sentiments about the on-campus health center, offers a pretty stark truth: If you want to have a wild night, you'd be better off getting down at the University of Iowa.
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Harrison Salisbury: The original smoking advocate at the University of Minnesota.

​A University of Minnesota student group is trying to push the anti-tobacco agenda a step further and ban all smoking across campus by 2013.

The Student Health Advisory Committee sent a letter to newbie college president Eric Kaler last month asking him to support the smoke-free cause.

The group also posted an online petition to rally student support, reigniting an age-old controversy on the college campus.

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Gophers coach Tubby Smith and the U of M are on the hook for $1 million.

​The University of Minnesota and head Gophers basketball coach Tubby Smith are on the hook for $1 million in a legal battle now four years in the making with would-be assistant coach Jimmy Williams.

In a judgement released Monday morning, an appellate judge affirmed that Smith misrepresented his authority by offering Williams an assistant coach position at the U of M in 2007 without clearance from higher ups.

After Williams resigned from his coaching job at Oklahoma State, his role in several "major" NCAA violations came to light. The U took back it's offer, so Williams sued.

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One or two of these kids probably even knows how to read.

​Down about the economy, unemployment, the rise of Asian commerce, the rapid growth in income inequality? Do not fear for the future of the American dream: The University of Minnesota just welcomed the smartest freshman class it's ever had.

The rest of us can just sit back and wait for them to graduate and fix all of this.

Well, okay, they might not technically be the "smartest" ever, but they're certainly the best test takers to ever put on yellow shirts, gather in packs of 20 or more, and march down 15th Avenue like they own the place.

Actually, these kids probably aren't making that hike, which U of M grads know leads to house parties hosted by upperclassmen. Based on their ACT scores, these kids are probably stuck inside their dorm rooms every Friday night, where they're, like, reading or something.
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Facebook.

Rob Thompson, a.k.a. "The Jazz Man," was a legend at the U of M.

​Rarely does the transferring of a bus driver make headlines.

But for University of Minnesota students and alumni, this is truly a tragic day. After 12 years, Rob Thompson, the U of M's storied "Jazz Man," has been transferred away from his campus route.

Thompson is a legend at the college, recognizable for his dark sunglasses, always-cheery "hey baby" greetings, and tendency to blast jazz music like Miles Davis from a boombox while cruising from the St. Paul to Minneapolis campus and back.

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Thirteen of Clubs, Flickr.

U of M police started targeting bikers after weeks of accidents and complaints in the area.

​The University of Minnesota police department began to beef up enforcement on bicyclists around the congested light-rail construction zone last Wednesday.

In one week, the college's police department ticketed 62 cyclists for failing to dismount on the sidewalk, says Lt. Troy Buhta. Each ticket runs $115, coming out to a total of $7,130 in tags.

"We warned for three weeks [before]," says Buhta. "Eventually we had to pull the trigger. You can only warn people so much."

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The Gemini Project logo is appropriately similar to a comic book character.

​Engineering is not one of the social sciences -- at times, it's more like anti-social.

But the University of Minnesota is setting about to change that, thanks to a series of new classes offered to engineering students that are meant to help them be a little less Isaac Newton, science weirdo, and a little more Isaac Hayes, soul man.

The U's new classes, called the Gemini Project, are geared around helping engineers on things  like teamwork, networking, and office politics, just in case the students ever have to, like, talk to another person.

The Gemini Project is the first of its kind, the program leader told the Minnesota Daily.

This is bad news for pretty much everyone else. Those engineering kids are already smart, can fix gadgets, and might actually make money someday. If the U can teach them how to be smooth, no one will want to date the rest of us idiots.
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Jerry Kill will take "some time" off to treat his seizures.

​Jerry Kill will seek treatment at Mayo Clinic for his seizures, which have continued to reoccur since he suffered one on the sidelines at the end of Minnesota's game against New Mexico State.

Last week, Kill announced that he'd had something like 20 seizures in six days, and explained that he'd been suffering from them from for years and wouldn't let it stop him from coaching. After the Gophers' 37-24 loss to North Dakota State University on Saturday, Kill suffered yet another seizure Sunday morning.

That, apparently, was one too many for Kill and his wife. Kill, making reference to his wife, explained his decision to seek treatment in a statement issued yesterday afternoon.

"The seizures continue to be a concern for me and my family," Kill said. "Rebecca and I have made the decision to do what it takes to find a solution. I hope to be back to work soon, but we believe that taking some time away to get a handle on this is the right thing to do."
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