Salon.com recently investigated the internet rumor that presidential candidate Howard Dean had a bit part in the 1984 movie "Ninja III: The Domination," about "a beautiful '80s aerobics practitioner possessed by the spirit of a ninja slain on a golf course." Democratic field offices quickly fired off press releases about their own candidate's brushes with Hollywood fame. The first three releases were shown yesterday, the rest are posted below.
Joseph Lieberman for President 2004, Press Release 01/16/04 -- We all knew, way back when, Li'l Joey Lieberman was destined for great things! He's too modest to admit it, but when he was just a lad he was quite a thespian. His most notable performance (including singing!) was as a representative for the Lollipop Guild in "The Wizard of Oz." Even then he was acting on his constituents' behalf! Of course, giving a big sucker to Miss Judy, as he calls his "Oz" costar, Judy Garland, around the campaign office, was his enormous honor and pleasure!
Al Sharpton for America, Press Release 1/20/04 -- "Elizabeth, I'm comin' to join ya!" Boy, how many times did Demond Wilson have to hear that over the course of the five years "Sanford and Son" enjoyed success on television and in American's hearts? Well, Demond has the next president of the United States, Al Sharpton, to thank for quitting the role of Lamont, Fred Sanford's beleaguered son, after shooting the pilot episode. Sitting through rehearsal after rehearsal with Redd Foxx and that woman who played Aunt Esther is what drove Al to the Lord.
Richard Gephardt 2004, Press Release 1/18/04 -- Only one [former] candidate in this race has [had] what it takes [took] to lead our nation during these troubled times. It's experience that came from starring as Los Angeles police officer Pete Malloy from 1968 to 1975 on "Adam 12," that one cop show everyone thinks they remember, but are really thinking of Emergency!
Last, and least, from Dennis Kucinich's mom -- Dear American Idle, Little Denny has always been a very nice boy, but back in the late 1960s he became a big soap opera star on "Dark Shadows," playing the satanic vampire Barnabas Collins, a not-so-very nice gentleman indeed. I usually missed it because it was on during "One Life to Live," but I hear my young man was quite a scary fellow!
Still is, Mrs. Kucinich, still is!