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Welcome back, men! Farewell, ladies!

Filed under: Imported

I've received several heartening emails from male Ranch readers reassuring me that they will continue to be faithful readers despite my recent focus on menstruation and diet chow. However, it looks like I've now managed to piss off a large klatch of chicks. Downer! DIABLO CODY IS HAVING THE WORST WEEK EVER!

I wrote this article with only a modicum of controversy in mind; really, it was intended as a harmless trend piece with the slightest frisson of feminist criticism nestled within. And now I've managed to anger lots of crafters who've accused me  (based on this wee creampuff article!) of hating women, being angry at the world, disemboweling manatees with a spork, killing hobos just to get an erection, etc. I feel like Ann Coulter!

As a journalist, I have to take criticism with a grain of Papa Dash; hostile letters come with the territory. Besides, I'm used to enraging certain women--for God's sake, my cell phone screensaver says "Tit Inspector." I like to assume a sexist pig persona for entertainment purposes--and I rarely get any flak because people understand my loony, priapic schtick. And I would have gotten away with it entirely if it weren't for these meddling girls!

 (Cody is led away by the sherriff, shaking her fists in disbelief.)

Of course, I've also received plenty of positive letters and feedback--lots of knitters and crafters were overjoyed that I chose to spotlight their obsession, and most people that read the entire article were pleased by the upbeat, redemptive tone of the ending. Plus, it probably generated some publicity for Crafty Planet, which has become the official supplier/pusherman for my nascent crossstitch addicition. I like Crafty Planet. And needles. And thread. And women. Especially strippers, because they always rub their noses in my pussy.

I don't normally acknowledge anything anyone writes about me, so this is kind of weird. But hey, it's refreshing to be panned after weeks of having my anus French kissed by various industry types. There's nothing like a flock of irate Midwestern knitters to reduce inflammation of the ego!

(A female journalist I know says she once received a letter from some feminists calling for her sterilization. I suppose I got off easy. As far as I know, I'm still allowed to reproduce, but if I turn up stabbed in the womb with a knitting needle, you know who to blame!)

Posted by Diablo Cody at May 31, 2005 3:40 PM

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