Product Review: District Cotton

I am a T-shirt person. I have at least 30 in rotation at any given time. I even have cotton-jersey bed sheets so I can feel as though I am swaddled in a giant T-shirt when I slumber in the arms of Morpheus. Figure 1A:

(Chihuahua was an unexpected variable. Note "action blur" as he dashes into frame.)

Living in L.A. has awakened my inner hippie. (Her name is Tangelo.) I've been riding my purple and pink beach cruiser everywhere--besides the actual beach, 'cause yo, who has time?--recycling bags like Diddy recycles beats, and even taking a prolonged break from eating animals. Luckily, Skittles are not an animal.

Anyway, my newfound crispity-crunchiness and lifelong love of T-shirts have found common ground in District Cotton apparel. It's softer than Mommy's tit, organique and fair trade. Gwyneth would approve.

My inorganic cyborg bosom cradled in organic cotton.

I like this one because it says "Factory Farming Stinks." Agreed. (If you're neutral on the subject, imagine your dog or cat's snout being sawed off with a hot knife. That's the reality of factory farming.)

Anyway, two opposable thumbs up for the comfy shizz. The hoodies are hot too. And if Princess Selfish of Planet Hedonia can grow a conscience, so can anyone.