Ten movie items we'd love to own in real life

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Nike Air MAGs
By now every hipster nerd out there has probably seen and coveted Nike's super-limited-edition Air MAGs, based on Marty McFly's kicks from Back to the Future II (if not, procrastinate for a few minutes by checking out the commercial here). Production of the shoes was limited to only 1,510 pairs, which were auctioned off via eBay with all proceeds going to the Michael J. Fox Foundation. They sold for around $5,000 each to folks like Kanye West, Kid Cudi (who bought four pairs), and San Francisco Giants relief pitcher Brian Wilson (who was seen sporting them in a bullpen covered in discarded sunflower seeds, baseball diamond clay, and dip spit, no doubt sending legions of sneaker freaks into hysterics). When the digital smoke cleared, the auction raised a staggering $5.7 million for Parkinson's research.

A truly worthy cause, but real talk? Those shoes are butt ugly.

Honestly, unless you're one of those aforementioned celebrities, chances are, you're gonna have a rough time pulling off that look in public. You might as well be rocking a pair of astronaut boots with your jeans. And good luck seeing those things survive a Minnesota winter.

That said, here's hoping the trend continues, because there are plenty of clothes, accessories, and home decor inspired by movies that everyday schmos actually could use or wear. For example:

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SCHWINN PRESENTS THE PEE-WEE HERMAN BICYCLE

Minneapolis is already the number one biking city in the county (still burns, doesn't it, Portland?). So, people might as well flaunt it with the greatest bicycle ever created. Sure, customs have been built, but for those of us who grew up pining for this ride from Pee-Wee's Big Adventure, this thing's gotta be mass-produced.
 




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THERMOS PRESENTS THE NAVIN R. JOHNSON

For anyone who was born a poor black child, had their wildest dreams come true, and then lost everything, but simply wanted the extra-best thermos money could buy all along, consider this production with stripes and a cup built right in. It's all you'll ever need...along with a chair...and a paddleball game...and a remote control...
 

WRESTLE JAM '88 for the Nintendo 3DS

If you miss the days of 8-bit graphics and blindly button-mashing your way to victory in classic NES games like Pro Wrestling, here's hoping the folks at Nintendo are working hard on this game seen in The Wrestler, featuring Randy "The Ram" Robinson in happier -- albeit pixilated -- times.

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Look at those awesome graphics!


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NEW ERA PRESENTS THE BAD NEWS BEARS 59FIFTY HAT

Yeah, you could settle for one of those crappy replica hats online which are basically Halloween costumes, but those of us who have collections of 59Fiftys demand only the best, so come on, New Era! The streets need an authentic Bears lid like the kids are wearing in The Bad News Bears (and if you can add a "Chico's Bail Bonds" commemorative patch to the side, all the better!).

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ADIDAS PRESENTS THE ZISSOU LINE

There have been several custom-made sneakers from the Team Zissou Adidas seen in The Life Aquatic. But why stop at just shoes? Open up a whole line of track jackets, swim trunks, and, of course, red knit hats. But let's hold off on the standard-issue glock since most buildings around town won't let you in with one (thankfully).


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5 comments
jamespittman9
jamespittman9

I am so curious as to what happened to that thermos. Anyone know if Steve Martin has it?


hb211
hb211

Hermes Presents Hermione's Beaded Bag from Harry Potter 7.1 and 7.2, with the Undetectable Extension Charm.  An evening bag that can hold several changes of clothes, a tent, and a small library (and somehow remain light enough to swing nonchalantly, no matter how much stuff you cram into it).

Sean Tubridy
Sean Tubridy

Jedi Supply Company presents a LIGHTSABER

David Foureyes
David Foureyes

Fender? Fender presents the amp that goes to 11? Have you guys not seen the film? It's clearly a fucking Marshall...

You guys may want to recall those editors you fired today...

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