Whether you love or hate baseball, summer, or growing up, one thing goes without saying: The Sandlot is one of the greatest movies ever made.
The coming-of-age tale about a group of young bros playing baseball, fighting dogs, and becoming super besties resonates with people of all ages, and still holds up as one of the best baseball-related movies ever made, even 20 years later.
This Sunday, following the Twins versus Red Sox game, Target Field will screen the film on the giant outdoor scoreboard. The evening will also include special guests: director David Mickey Evans, Chauncey Leopardi (Squints), and Patrick Renna (Ham).
YOU GUYS. Read that last part again and explain why you don't have your tickets yet.
But just in case you still don't realize why you must get to Target Field this Sunday, we went back and found the top three life lessons every person can learn from The Sandlot.
1. "You play ball like a girl!" will win any argument
When the Sandlot gang comes face to face with their arch rivals, big man Ham goes insult-for-insult with some spoiled dickbag named Phillips. After some intense slams, including "butt sniffer" and "scab eater," Ham nails him with the death blow: challenging Phillips's baseball skills by comparing him to a female. This statement will win you pretty much any argument, either at work, home, or even in government. Use it wisely.
2. Faking your own death is the ultimate way to score chicks
In the classic "nerd loves girl" scene, our man Squints fakes his own pseudo-death in a pool, as a clever ploy to suck face with certified hot chick (and top-notch lifeguard) Wendy Peffercorn. Is it sleazy as hell? Yes. Could it technically be considered assault? Maybe. But did it give hope to generations of nerdy dudes hoping to make out with hot lifeguards? Goddamn right. God bless you, Squints. Keep lotioning and oiling.
3. S'mores are the greatest food ever invented
This is the only way to make a s'more. Pay attention.
Whether you're taking your kiddos to see Benny's pickle against the Beast for the very first time, or you just want to remember what an L-7 weenie Smalls was (because let's be honest -- he had no business hanging with the crew), you need to make your way down to Target Field this Sunday, and bring along your shitty plastic baseball glove and giant-brimmed cap.
IF YOU GO:
The Sandlot Sunday, May 19 Approximately 4:30 p.m. (following the Twins vs. Red Sox game) More information here