Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated

Categories: Dating
GuysYouDated10Collage.jpg
Ken Avidor
The reasons that romantic relationships start and stop are complex, situational, and highly personal. However, for better or worse, you may find that certain personality types tend to float into your world at different phases of your life. Sometimes things end in flames, sometimes these guys end up transitioning into a best friend, and sometimes you put a ring on it. Regardless of the outcome, at least you ended up a little wiser at the end of the day (and with a few good stories to share over drinks).

To complement our "10 Twin Cities ladies you've probably dated" piece, we've come up with a list of 10 Twin Cities archetypes you're likely to have met while making your way through the local dating scene.

See also:
Ten Twin Cities ladies you've probably dated

LOL at this New York Times article about the Minneapolis dating scene

TenGuysYouDatedTechGuy.jpg
Ken Avidor
Tech Guy's work hours might be spent as the IT guy in an office, manager of a team at Best Buy, or as a Geek Squad member who's always on the road. He may even pick up some extra cash working part-time at Gamestop or freelancing at Game Informer. His off-hours are fully dedicated to the online world. You may meet Tech Guy during a Final Fantasy, Grand Theft Auto, or Guild Wars session. You might meet him gaming on a couch in real life at a friend's house. He might be the guy who cleans the Malware off your work computer and then asks you out for a beer. Regardless, things will get hot and heavy once you take it to Gchat. On the plus side, you'll never have to hide your embarrassing fan-girling over things like Sailor Moon or My Little Ponies from him, as he has his own geeky obsessions and appreciates that you have yours too. However, if you date Tech Guy, you'll have to make peace with his tendency to fall down video-game rabbit holes for days (or weeks) at a time. Also, unless he's an extrovert, he may be a bit anti-social... unless he's in a gaming chat room.

TenGuysYouDatedBikeHipster.jpg
Ken Avidor
The Bike Hipster does not own a car. He does, however, spend about as much money on his ride (and accessories) in order to bike year-round as most guys do on a car. Which is admirable, given that Minnesota's winters can be pretty cruel. Cycling for this guy is a lifestyle, and during the time you date it will be your lifestyle, too. Early meetups will consist of charming rides where you'll picnic or hop in a lake, and you'll find that riding together in the wee hours of the morning is oddly romantic and adventurous. He knows all the roads with bike lanes, and is familiar with the tricky trails, from the Greenway to the Cedar to the river parkways, so traveling with him is like seeing the city with completely new eyes. Weekends will be spent meeting other friendly bike hipsters at annual events, cheering your boy on (and biting your nails) at alley-cat races, and signing up for rides you never though you could do, like the Powderhorn24. It's best to get with a Bike Hipster in the spring or summer, when riding season is at its peak. Things might cool with the changing of the weather. Despite what Bike Hipster might believe, riding year-round just isn't for everyone. But if you end things on good terms, you'll always have a great friend to take bike shopping, and he will always have someone to give him a lift when he really needs it.

Corrected_TYpo_3_GUY.jpg
Ken Avidor
Commercially Creative Guy understands that he doesn't have to sell his soul to make a living. He didn't get a degree from MCAD to be a starving artist, after all. Sure, his job usually has something to do with designing slick websites, drawing animations for television commercials, or thinking up PR campaigns for media organizations, but he also has a fulfilling creative life outside of work. He might be part of an artist collective, make film shorts in his spare time, or have a studio in northeast Minneapolis where he makes things like print art or wallpaper or light installations. He has an eye for aesthetics, so his apartment is always impeccable, looking like it belongs in a lifestyle magazine. Dates with this guy might involve putting on a pretty dress from Cliche or Primp, sipping a glass of wine on his patio, heading over to a gallery opening, and then having dessert at a quiet little cafe. Soon, you'll start to recognize the regulars at Walker After Hours parties, MPR in-studio concerts, and Wits. While Commercially Creative Guy can fall victim to pretentiousness, he will always be aesthetically on point and up to something interesting.

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35 comments
fomer0506
fomer0506

I would love to date almost all of these types except 'Mr. Big & The Bro'.. everyone else is alrightttttttttttttt :-)

orangevening11
orangevening11

I'm a combo of a couple of  these, but missing a important part- nobody dates me

calenti
calenti

Why is the stoner the only non-white guy? Seriously - why?

calenti
calenti

Why is the stoner the only non-white guy? Seriously, why? 

Was that part of the humor of the article-that the only neurotic guys are white and the stoner is just some kind of cartoon affirmative action progream?

SonofA
SonofA

These are racist stereotypes! LOL!!!!

Drummerchick
Drummerchick

Oh look, another xenocentric, sexist, supposed to be witty- ha ha - stereotyping pos. 'cause you know, if you do the white dude version to compensate for the xenocentric, sexist, supposed to be witty- ha ha - stereotyping pos girl version, it makes it all better.

Thank you City Pages for staying true to form.

digitalprotocol
digitalprotocol topcommenter

what about wisconsin hicks who think living in uptown makes them cultured. 

waht about all the hicks that have infiltrated our urban utopia?

Mike Green
Mike Green

MUSIC HEAD!!! Nice im on the list!!

galamaria
galamaria

I agree with swmnguy; this was a generous piece.  Especially re: the St. Thomas MBA types - I've never seen such arrogant blowhards with so little to back it up.  (Dude, no one outside of the Twin Cities has *ever* heard of St. Thomas!  It ain't the Harvard of the Midwest!)

swmnguy
swmnguy topcommenter

I was hoping for something a little less generous.  Ms. Armbruster pulled a lot of punches here.  There's some great comedy in Twin Cities Y-Chromosome territory.  This was a bit too nice. 

Tony Anderson
Tony Anderson

They should have had sexy bartender playboy as a category . Maybee not someone you date but def go home with when your man isn't around

Ross Levine
Ross Levine

"Tech guys" (even tech guys who work at the geek squad..) kind of exist all over though? That and trying to finish the "Mr. Big Time" description was...challenging :P .

catyanish
catyanish

I feel like these are way less negative than the female versions. . . . .

Courtney Hannon
Courtney Hannon

LOL verbal piss. Come on, this is seriously accurate. I was like check...check.....check.....nope.....check....

truckmeyer
truckmeyer

Hmmm...I'm a little bit of all these dudes.  I better focus, or I'll never meet my soulmate and stuff.

get-it-together
get-it-together

You forgot one. The poor City Pages writer who doesn't know how to proof read his articles. Man, poorly written!

Maggie Strugala
Maggie Strugala

Oh bummer. I thought there was actually going to be specific men named, and then I was going to feel like the Bees Knees for dating all of them! haha

ajlalk3
ajlalk3 topcommenter

Ken Avidor botched the "Commecially Creative Guy" drawing by leaving out the "R". Whoops!

Also, these are just as lame and overly stereotypical as the female ones. As a guy, I am not in any way shocked, appalled or offended (unlike a lot of the ladies last week), just bummed that I wasted 10 minutes of my life reading these.

ajlalk3
ajlalk3 topcommenter

@Tony Anderson Speaking from experience Tony?

ajlalk3
ajlalk3 topcommenter

@Cass Kitchenmaster You really have trouble holding onto a man, don't you?

ajlalk3
ajlalk3 topcommenter

Fixed now!

Arkadi
Arkadi

@ajlalk3 Let me get this straight--you're bummed that you wasted 10 minutes of your life reading this, but then stick around long enough to see if the typos are corrected?

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