I Can't Believe It's Not Paint Thinner Vol. 18

The label on the bottle of RonDiaz (all one word, mind you) tells the "legend" of a man named Ron Diaz (two words). Diaz is said to have travel the Caribbean in scoping out ingredients to make the best rum ever. Hmmm... Not sure I'm believing that tall tale, but we'll drink his 27.5 percent alcohol by volume rum anyway.

This, like the root beer schnapps, leaves us wondering what to mix it with. Nate Patrin stroked his beard and suggested Sunkist orange juice. A good idea. The rest of us followed suit with orange Gatorade and orange soda.

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Ward Rubrecht: (Gasps) That was really overpowering. Mike Kooiman: This is totally drinkable straight. But it's missing an umbrella. Jessica Armbruster: This is really good, it tastes like orange cough syrup that I liked as a kid. MK: Oh, here we go with your childhood substance abuse. WR: It's totally OK once you mix it with something. MK: I was hoping it would be the cabana boy kind. You hottie on the back of the bottle.

WR: Here's my question: why would you ever buy flavored rum? Why not just get regular rum and a mixer.

MK: Because there are girls.

Nate Patrin: Rod Diaz sounds like a crappy baseball card you'd get in the mid-80s. 'Aww, I was hoping for Eddie Murray but I got Ron Diaz.'

MK: I used to love Billy Ocean.
(Breaks into singing "Loverboy.")

MK: (Reading the recipe for a drink called golden banana on the bottle's label.) Ohhh! We could have a golden banana.

MK&NP snicker.

NP: I don't like it with orange soda. It's like an all syrup squishy.

Our one-liter bottle of RonDiaz banana rum cost $9.99.


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