Caring: It's the new evil

Unless you have a heart made of glowing nuclear waste, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition will probably cause persistent tear ups. And if you do have a heart made of nuclear waste, or worse--diseased tear ducts that have left you with the inability to cry--the show will probably come to your home, demolish it, and leave you with a well-decorated sanitized biodome where your irritatingly dry eyes can feel moist again. A few months ago, the show built a new home for woman who was dying from cancer and wanted to leave behind a home for her three adopted children, all of whom had AIDS. And this Sunday, Ty Pennington and Co. create a house for a father who lost his eyesight in a workplace shooting.

Not one to be outdone (Those evil bastards are ruining my career!) Mark Burnett, the godfather of reality TV,  is shopping his new reality show, Giving Hope, to networks. The show, he says, will be about, umm, "giving  hope" to people in need, like "people in Kansas who have lost their farm and need help getting back on their feet." Hey, are you rolling your eyes? Or is that a tear I see?