Cinco de Maroulis! By Amelia Huff, Age 10 1/2
Well it hapened. The thing I thought would never hapen. My mom was nice to me? Nope, she's still acting like her Tampex is stuck. I got a bra? Not yet, tho I do my special exercises every night. Dad and Megan got a divorce? I WISH! No the thing that hapened was Constantine Maroulis got voted off American Idol. I cant beleive it. It's like if Jesus was on TV every Tuesday and then Pontius Pilate suddenly came on and said "HA HA HA No Jesus you cant sing Bohemian Rhapsody anymore because I hate your beerd." And Jesus went away to his house in New Jersy and he didnt come back. And there was no Easter, and there were devils everywhere lauging and dancing. Thats what it feels like with Constantine gone. I cryed for like a hour. My dog Howie got wet because I cryed so hard.
My cousin Morgan and me decided we're going to college at the University of New Jersy so we can live by Constantine. I am goign to major in Singing and she is going to major in Fashion Inventing. We both plan to have bras by then.
But their is good news: Thursday is is a Spanish holiday called Cinco de Mayo, and we are having a fiesta in my class! We are going to sing Spanish songs and everyone will bring a diffierent food to share. I am bringing Frito Pie. Its an authentic dish containing Fritos and hamburger with special spices. The Fritos go on top.I also got Blue Blow Pops for the class pinata. I wonder what Emma is going to bring? She speaks Spanish. She is from Puorto Rico so she probly knows tons about Cinco de Mayo. I hope she doesnt bring Frito Pie too! My dad would probaby say I got Cock Blocked! Thats what he always says when things are unfair.
So on top of Constantine being gone from American Idol, I also found out that Bo Bice does Cocaine. Now you may think I dont know what Cocaine is but I do. I took DARE last year and we learned that it is a white powder that makes you big and strong so you can cheat at football. That must be why Bo is so tall and handsome. Maybe Anthony Federov needs to get some Cocaine! Then hed be cute like Bo. Im starting to wish all the boys in my class would eat a ton of Cocaine. Then theyd all be tall like Bo and have bigger weiners. Oviously Cocaine isnt bad for you or Bo would be dead. He isnt dead. Just cute!!!