Can You Handle My Truth?

Categories: General Archive

No I dont think you can handle my truth. Or my contraversy!!! Hee hee, Im just acting like Britney Spears. Thats my very good impresionation of her. Anyway I got to see Britney and Kevin: Chaotic last night even though my mom said I was not aloud to. But I cryed and said that Dad would let me watch it and why did they get a divorce? (Because my mom liked a guy at her bowling leeg and let him touch the inside of her pants.) Then my mom got real quiet and red. She went upstairs and let me watch the show alone!!!!! I love being divorced.

britney was wierd. She kept asking pepole "what is your favorite sexual position?" Now I do know what sex is. (Its when Kevin Federline puts his thing in Britneys NO place. And she doesnt say NO or tell an adult like they say to at shcool.) Their is only 1 position for this: The girl goes on the bottom and the boy goes on the top so his sperms can go in a strait line. Maybe Britney doesnt know that. I think britney needs to take Family Life class like all the fifth graders do at my school.

Britney did not look like a famos person. Her skin looked funny. Her voice sounded kind of like, I dont know, a dumb person? I know she is natrally very smart because she is rich and has a bunch of Kids Choice awards and a probly a mansion with a waterfall and dolphins you can swim with and a refrigerater thats covered in diamonds and jools. So I dont know why she wasnt acting smart on the show. Its silly to play dumb to make a boy like you. Boys should like you for you, even if you are too flat for a bra and have glasses and like Steely Dan and stuff. (Im listening to "Deacon Blues" right now!!!)

Kevin was really cute. Cuter then Constantine Maroulis. Even cuter than Bo Bice. I think Kevin must take a lot of Cocaine because he is super cute in the same way Bo is. They both look like they are poor and maybe dont shower every day. And maybe they smell like gasaline. They both look like they might drive a bad car like a Pontiac Aztec. They both look like they have a lot of sperms and like making ladies preagnent. They are both SO BEUTIFUL. I hope I have a boyfreind like Kevin or Bo someday and we make a sweet little baby and name her Madison or Emma. (Those are my two special girls names I am going to use when I am a mom. DONT steal them!!!!!)

I am so happy for Britney and Kevin. And now Kevins kids have a beutiful stepmother who is rich and nice. Lucky them!!!!


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