I like backpacks and I cannot lie. But I hate your little hoodrat friend.

The Hold Steady will soon be making their screen debut in Odds Against Seven, a short film by Target. Yes, Target. Sure, calling it a screen debut is a stretch, since this is a film release limited to computer screens. But some film-school student went to great pains to create this wannabe-John Hughes-ian short, which is ostensibly about a college kid trying to find a band to play at his school's first party. Of course it's really about the lil' red discount store's "hip brand identity," and what better way to shout it loud than via a Crucifixion Cruise?

Or the company could go another route to market to a young, media-savvy demographic, perhaps using a song about ass fetishes that employs a whip as a sound effect. Click here to launch the new back-to-school commercial, "Baby Got Back...Packs."