Halloween Show Planner 2008

seawhores.jpg
Halloween, again. Wasn’t it meant to be a child’s holiday? If my history is correct, this annual ritual was invented to teach children how to bully adults, to instill in the national youth the virtues of beggary by fearful masquerade. So where do all these grown-ups get off, shoe-horning themselves in on all the fun?

The holiday brings out the most performative in us all. From punk basements to metal bars, the pressure to one-up your fellow man with the most outlandish, culturally irrelevant, sharp-witted costume is enough to make anyone cringe just a little bit. But what’s Halloween without fear? There’s no shortage of theme nights on the horizon, and, as if you didn't already have your plans made, below is a short list of nights that do their damndest to snatch this bizarre night away from its rightful owners -- spoiled, sugar-charged brats.

FRIDAY, OCT. 31:


THE LOFT (above BARFLY)
Shelter Halloween with:
PAUL BIRKEN *LIVE*
DJ ETONES
CHRISTIAN JAMES
Prize goes to the best costume; edits of old-school horror movies will play all night
18+ $10/21+ $10

TURF CLUB
Zebulon Pike
Heroine Sheiks
Seawhores
Guystorm
21+, 9 p.m.


LEE'S LIQUOR LOUNGE
E.L.nO., covering ELO
Little Man, covering T-Rex
21+, 9:30 p.m., $10

TRIPLE ROCK SOCIAL CLUB
Shit Sandwich, covering Spinal Tap
If You Want Blood, covering Bon Scott era AC/DC (Members of 20 Dollar Love)
We Who Can Not Be Named, covering The Dwarves (Members of the Quincy Punx)
Sirens of Titan, covering Sound garden (members of Sirens of Titan)
We Aren’t The League, coveringAnti-Nowhere League (Members of Impaler, Hostages, and Iron Fist)
Power of 2 w/ Margret Lane, covering Yeah Yeah Yeahs
$6.00 with a costume, $8.00 without.

331 CLUB
All the Pretty Horses
Gay Witch Abortion
The Funeral and the Twilight
21+, Free

UPTOWN BAR
Pabst Halloween Party
Akimbo (from Seattle WA)
Buildings
Economy Team
CONDO$
Prizes for best costumes include a Pabst Longboard, Pabst t-shirts, Pabst hats, and a bunch of other disposable crap you’d sooner trade for a Tall Boy.
21+, $6.00


HEXAGON BAR

Bastard Saint
Castle
Orwell (La Crosse, WI)
Thula
Rise of the Empire
21+. Free, like Mandela.

And undoubtedly, the award for the most insistent and consequential costume party goes to the NOMAD WORLD PUB, which is free for the costumed, and a hefty $13.00 for the plainclothed.
The Come-Ons
Freddie's Sweater (AKA Officer Gentlemen)
Aaron and the Sea
USA Solid Golden Retrievers


SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 1:


ROY WILKINS AUDITORIUM:
Beastie Boys
Tenacious D
Ben Harper

TRIPLE ROCK:
The King Kahn & BBQ Show
Women
Fuck Knights
9 PM, 21+, $12.00

FIRST AVENUE:
GWAR
Kingdom of Sorrow
Toxic holocaust

7TH ST. ENTRY:
Jeans Team

THE BEAT COFFEE SHOP
To Kill A Petty Bourgeoise
Maps Of Norway
Auspice
All Ages

These are all fine suggestions of ways to abandon your corporeal self for a night. But should you decide to buck the system, all you’ll need to find a decent time and meet a masked stranger is a rock. Chuck it -- you’ll hit a bar with a theme night, a DJ, and plenty of people looking to keep their inner Clark Kent in check.


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