Ireland's Greatest Hits
On this Saint Patrick's day, while so many rivers are being dyed so many shades of green, and so many dopey plastic derbies perch so precariously atop so many unsteady, non-Irish heads, it's only fitting that Gimme Noise, in our never ending quest to catalog everything not worth knowing, would draw up a short list of the finest bits of culture and non-culture to leak out of the emerald isle.
So while your average Tom, dick or Harry was on about Samuel Beckett, Guinness and peat moss, Gimme Noise presents our list of Ireland's greatest hits.
1. Bobby Sands-- This dude didn't fuck around. Ran with the IRA and won a seat in Parliament by not eating, once again proving that the English have a soft spot for hungry people.
2. James Joyce-- Noted olfactophile, writer of blasphemously quixotic prose. Joyce's work is most famous for making even the most adroit college professors feel like big fat stupid idiots.
3. Hurling-- A badass sport that only occasionally pops up on those weird sports channels at the furthest end of your satellite subscription. Think field hockey sans skirts. You can actually club people with the sticks and not get fined for it.
4. Skirts and kidneys-- Irish stew made with pork kidney. Every bit as delicious as you'd imagine.
5. Irish Spring-- Manly, yes. But we like it too.
Machine Gun Terry Druggan
The population of Butte, Montana
Happy St. Patrick's day, gang!