Jim Breuer stages freakout during commercial shoot
We'll admit it-- for about two minutes, Jim Breuer had us going. The sight of the unfunniest, most cringingly desperate comic to crawl from the ooze in the last 20 years sabotaging a pitiable Domino's commercial? Seemed plausible enough.
Look upon his works, ye mighty, and tremble-- Jim Breuer is selling you Domino's pizza.
But when Breuer begins to posture to the burly P.A., and the P.A. does not immediately tear Breuer's head from his shoulders, partially cannibalize the comic's heart, and use the blood to adorn himself with fearsome warpaint, we knew it was a hoax. Because this is precisely what would happen if Jim Breuer ever actually postured to someone.
Even if we smoked pot, we would find Breuer's existence fundamentally objectionable. Stick up for Half Baked if you like-- we won't judge. You can't run from the fact that Breuer is an affront to everything fine and subtle about human comedy.
See, there's a reason this clip only has 13,000 views. Because the only answer to any question about Jim Breuer is "who cares?" The guy hasn't been relevant since his work in Titan A.E. This little tantrum stunt might give Christian Bale a little bad-boy P.R. But Christian Bale is Batman. Jim Breuer is a guy trying to trick you into eating bad pan pizza.
In any case, consider this proof positive that Domino's can truly stoop no lower. Although, who knows- next time you turn around, you might be seeing Kevin Meany wagging some cheese bread in your face.