LGBT line dancin' this and every weekend

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Alright ladies.

1, 2, 3, 4.

Right vine, diagonal heel/clap, left vine, diagonal heel/clap, step together, diagonal heel/clap, step together, diagonal heel/clap, swivel heels right, left, right, center, stamp, stamp, kick, kick, ball-change, stamp, kick, kick, forward, hook behind, back, hitch, back, hitch, forward, scuff/turn, and do it again.

And now you know how to do the Boot Scootin' Boogie. This video doesn't do a very good job of demonstrating the line dance craze of the early 90s, but I would like you to take a moment with me now to appreciate Judy Broers' dress and wall décor.

Beautiful, Judy. Just beautiful.

When's the last time you line danced? I spent hours upon hours perfecting the Boot Scootin' Boogie in my parents' rec room, desirous as I was of being the line dancing champ in gym class. I didn't have MTV. I didn't realize "line dance champ" wasn't an honor one oughtta strive for in the fifth grade. Uncool then as I am now, a friend randomly whipped out some Boot Scootin' Boogie knowledge when we were feeling a little out of place while dancing at a downtown club. Might as well own it, eh? And I recently re-learned the Boot Scootin' Boogie to entertain another friend, who actually does know how to dance. I think I was drunk and almost fell over.

You want to learn this esteemed dance? Good luck. Who the hell line dances anymore?

I'LL TELL YOU WHO. Members of the local LGBT community, that's who the hell who.

This Saturday, Diva Riot hosts the Cowgirl Ball Country Western Dance for queer women and friends (Rumours Innuendo, 213 4th St East, St. Paul. 6:30-7PM dance lessons, 7-11PM open dance with $5 cover, 21+). No partner needed and beginners welcome.

Once you've checked out the Cowgirl Ball, if you find yourself hooked and want to do some line dancin' and two steppin' on the regular, 2-Step MSP hosts the GLBT Country Barn Dance every Sunday at Lee's Liquor Lounge (101 N. Glenwood Ave, Minneapolis. 6-7PM lessons, 7PM open dancing, free, 21+). If you've still not had enough stamp stamp kick kick ball-change, the group is also hosting a Holiday Dance at the Uptown VFW on Saturday December 12 (2916 Lyndale Ave S, Minneapolis. 9PM-12:30AM, $10 cover includes one free drink).

Feeling nervous? Just follow 2-Step MSP's simple rules for country dancing:

Always be courteous to other dancers on the floor. Couples should try to avoid bumps and bangs on the floor. The Follow probably can't see what's coming but the Lead can! If there is a collision always apologize (even if it isn't your fault). This usually prevents unnecessary unpleasantness and often leads to the forging of some great new friendships. However, don't make a habit of making new acquaintances in this way!

Men or Women with partners should ensure that both their first and their last dance is with his/her own partner. Common courtesy also dictates that if you see someone without a partner you should, as they said in the old days, "mark their card" and take the floor with them at least once. If you do dance with a different partner NEVER walk away from them after the dance has ended. Always walk them back to their seat.

It is always good manners to dance when asked. If, for some reason, you cannot dance at that moment, apologize, and BE SURE to find that person later on to dance with them.

Bump into some new friends, mark some cards and deny no one. My fifth grade gym class may have judged me, but I'm on your side, darlin's. Boot scoot away.

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