David Hasselhoff tops our 10 most-read stories of 2009

​Sometimes, web metrics can reveal unsettling trends. Case in point: If our list of most-read items in 2009 is any indication, you guys really like reading about David Hasselhoff and sex. Like we should be surprised...

If you've ever wondered what floats the average Gimme Noise reader's boat, this list might provide some insight into what our audience finds most interesting. Or it might just prove, once again, that people will reliably click on headlines with words like "penis cage" and "strip club etiquette." Either way, we were intrigued, and we couldn't help but share the results.

1. David Hasselhoff: The 10 most memorable moments

2. The Wet Spot: 24 hours in the penis cage

3. The Wet Spot: The real story of Patrick's prom

4. The Wet Spot: The truth about Asian massage parlors

5. The Wet Spot: Proper strip club etiquette

6. Kanye 'Gay Fish' West leaves gaping hole in the Twitterverse

7. Top 10 most ridiculous country songs of '09

8. Hulk Hogan rallies Hulkamanaics, talks to Gimme Noise

9. Worst Minnesota fashion trends of the '00s

10. The Wet Spot: Creating the ultimate prom night