Bret Michaels/Miley Cyrus team-up isn't as scandalous and creepy as it needs to be
"Nothing to Lose" could theoretically be about Michaels bagging any or all of the half-his-age, collagen-enabled truck-stop skanks who awkwardly sucked face with him on his depressing, train wreck-quality quests for love (or backstage on his tour stops) but inviting Cyrus along to warble back-up vocals (she sounds absolutely horrible, like the producers didn't bother to digitally sweeten a single note) signals that they've got something going on, or they want the public to believe that they do, which is fucking icky. But what a dry way to go about it: there is nothing even remotely dangerous or risque about "Nothing to Lose," a mid-tempo, anonymously MOR glutch of strummed acoustics and piped-in strings that any pair of C&W nobodies could have sung. You know who this song is for? This song is for cougars. Over-the-hill cougars who can relate. There's no reason that you should remember it after listening to it once, unless maybe you're Daisy de la Hoya or Taya Parker.
Is it creepy that Michaels and Cyrus are harmonizing about liasions that should never, ever happen? Sure, kinda. But it's not creepy enough, in the way a R.Kelly/Aliayah or Billy Corgan/Jessica Simpson pairing is. If you wanna shock a jaded public in 2010, you've gotta be more explicit about actual or implied transgressions: This isn't cutting it.