Remix Bob Dylan for fun and profit

​Want to go to SXSW for free? Like Sony Music Entertainment Corporation? Then you might like to try your hand at remixing Bob Dylan for a contest sponsored by Sony. I did, and boy is my rage tired...

A promotional tool for the Ting Tings and 2AM Club and Bob Dylan, Sony recently launched The Remix Project, wherein you drag and drop various elements - presented as videos - of Dylan's "Subterranean Homesick Blues" into a little grid field and it arranges them nicely and plays them for you. IN THEIR DREAMS.

In reality the little internet widget is a horribly programmed, slow-loading, hiccup-laden, and infuriating piece of shit. After trying it in three separate web browsers, I settled in and began "remixing." Being an artist is NOT easy, guys. Where to drop that sick ibo line from randos dude John? Hmm, probably on "Verse 3."

If your computer appears to have just contracted the ILOVEYOU virus, that means it's working.

Now, once you've spent an hour and one-half "creating" your "remix," it's time to save it and submit and share it with your friends. IN YOUR DREAMS. When you click save a little window pops up (that appears to be made with a Java beta from 1996) asking you to share all of your Facebook information (done), add a Facebook application (done), then your name, date of birth, phone number, and email (done). And...voila? If you think nothing happened and your remix is gone, that's because it is. Sony Music Entertainment probably spent over 10 thousand dollars on this. You should try it!

I have no idea where my remix went, but it sounded something like this: