As you are likely aware, Prince Rogers Nelson has, for the past month and change, been putting peoples' brains in a blender with his Welcome 2 America not-really-a-tour of New York and New Jersey.
Last night's show at Madison Square Garden marked possibly the most celebrity-shellacked audience of Prince's recent shows, or maybe just the most prolifically tweeted, owing to Prince's serenading of a girl everyone pretended to know: Leighton Meester!
Okay. Who?
Getting sung to by Prince, while on stage at a sold-out Madison Square Garden, isn't something I thought the universe had room for. The potential for galactic implosion inversely caused by the exponential ballooning of one woman's poor, swooning heart is threat enough. But when that woman isn't Venus or Beyonce or Lolita, but a gorgeous, relatively green young actress best known for her role as an Upper East Side socialite in Gossip Girl, things begin to get hazy. Neil deGrasse Tyson calls what happens to your body in a black hole "spaghettification."
Look how close we all came to complete annihilation! As a reference and explanation as to why Prince singled Ms. Meester out, here's a better photo: