Ron Paul

CGI Ron Paul can survive a flood and keep talking

Filed under: Ron Paul

Just when you thought it was safe, Pennsylvania. Just when you thought we had narrowed the field to three major-party candidates. Ron Paul is back! With a vengeance.

Well, not "Ron Paul," exactly. The Paulbots that stalk the Internet seeking heretic blood have created a golem in the man's image, a cybernetic libertarian warrior, a bizarre animatronic orator. A Paulbot that is almost literal.

Don't take my word for it. Watch this "High Tide" promo, which features a computer generated animation of Paul speaking while hilarity ensues all around him.

Watch it twice. I'm serious. Otherwise, you'll miss the details, like submersible doves swim-flying around the submerged candidate as flood waters abate. Or Ron's avatar traveling through time to meet and blow off the framers of the Constitution. An unseen cheering throng comes into full throat as money flies around Paul.

This is one weird video. There is no getting around it.

Weirdest of all, the real Ron Paul has moved on from the presidential race, choosing to focus on keeping his congressional seat. In his place, we have this technological vision of his backers.

The question is: is this a good trade? As the comments in this thread make clear, I think Ron Paul is a bigot who has shamefully made a political career out of pandering to the worst elements of society. Might we be better off with a mere simalcrum?

Let's consider the points in favor of each candidate: the real Ron Paul and the CGI version.

REAL RON PAUL

"I swear I didn't know about all the racist stuff my campaign did for 40 years."

FIVE POINTS IN REAL RON PAUL'S FAVOR
* Doesn't want to bomb Iran, wants to pull out of Iraq
* Wants online poker to be legal
* Wears an oddly confused expression even when expressing rage, which takes the edge off and makes him appear marginally sane
* Keeps fighting on against unimaginable odds, which makes him kind of like a vampire Don Quixote -- probably utterly impossible to kill
* Has less empty, soulless eyes than CGI Ron Paul

CGI RON PAUL

"I'll swallow your soul."

FIVE POINTS IN CGI RON PAUL'S FAVOR
* Can survive a flood and keep talking while water should be filling his mouth
* Meets the Founding Fathers, but more or less ignores them, showing he's his own man (er, animated character)
* Can avoid temptation to "make it rain" while a money whirlwind surrounds him (shows independence)
* Took no money from white supremacist groups, does not have Klan members organizing for him, did not oppose the Civil Rights Movement
* Is not real

The last item is the most desirable trait of them all, one I wish the real Ron Paul shared. One day, this dream of a Ron Paul-free world will be realized. But until then, CGI Ron Paul has my vote.

Posted by Jeff Shaw at April 22, 2008 5:27 AM | Comments (38)

 

Ron Paul revolution scoffs at traffic safety

Filed under: Ron Paul

The Revolution will not use its rear-view mirrors.

Heard this one about the 18-year-old Ron Paul supporter whose fervor will cost him hundreds of dollars? An 18-year-old from Owatonna has had near-daily trouble with the law due to his oversized candidate sticker.

Cody Hauer has been cited four times in one week for displaying a 13-inch-by-40-inch "Ron Paul Revolution" decal in the rear window of his car. The problem is that such decals are illegal if they obstruct the driver's view.

These citations could amount to $550, and it's not like the Owatonna cops go looking for trouble. Police chief Shaun LaDue told the Associated Press that Hauer shows direspect for the officers every time he gets pulled over, and "talks himself into a citation each time."

Some would say this type of stubborn commitment to one's candidate is more than a bit stupid -- but I see it as justifiable contempt for these "laws" designed to enhance "public safety" based on being able to "see other cars." Humbug!

This type of civil disobedience is in the tradition of Ron Paul's hero, Martin Luther King. King fought to integrate the school system; Ron Paul wants to abolish the federal highway system, because, you know, who needs roads? Road users should pull themselves up by their bootstraps.

It's a modern civil rights struggle. Besides, if there were no federal highways, there would be fewer places for young men like Cody Hauer to get tickets.

Hauer says the cops are guilty of hassling him for "DWR -- driving while Republican." This is basically confirmed by the recent rash of police beatings involving Owatonna's Fred Thompson supporters. What's next, pastoral Minnesota? Turning the fire hoses on the many followers of Mike Huckabee with tinted windows? All for the so-called "crime" of putting a three-and-a-half-foot blockage in one's field of vision. The freedom to back over your neighbor's dog is in the Constitution somewhere, and if not, it should be.

Pity poor Cody Hauer. Maybe he should have used that $550 to buy ad time on the blimp instead.

Posted by Jeff Shaw at February 11, 2008 1:40 AM | Comments (18)

 

Ronnie Kravitz Love Revolution

Filed under: Ron Paul

The gap between Ron Paul's political stances over the years and his supporter-chosen unofficial slogan, "Ron Paul Love Revolution," is hilarious in its incongruity. A paleoconservative coming with the hippie rhetoric? Fascinating.

Also coming with the retro style is Lenny Kravitz, but beyond that, they don't seem to have much in common. Sure, Lenny is currently practicing abstinence, and I'm sure the right loves that. But he's not exactly the poster child for a candidate whose relationship with race is, ahem, complicated.

Yet Kravitz, who played at Myth last night, has at least one flourish in common with Storm Front's favorite candidate. His tour is -- wait for it -- the Love Revolution tour! Word on the street is that this is no coincidence. In fact, we've obtained a rare PR still of Ron Paul jamming with Kravitz' band before he announced his candidacy:

Ron Paul may have hated and reviled Martin Luther King until it became politically expedient, but he sure loves some Lenny Kravitz. Let Love Rule, Ron!

Posted by Jeff Shaw at January 24, 2008 9:50 PM | Comments (8)

 

Ron Paul Supporters to Drop Money Bomb on MLK Day

Filed under: Ron Paul

Word on the blogosphere has it that Ron Paul's merry pranksters are planning to drop a "money bomb" tomorrow (Monday) to coincide with Martin Luther King Jr. Day. (Money bombs are days in which Paul supporters dump huge sums of cash into Paul's campaign coffers. Previous bombs were dropped on Guy Fawkes Day [Nov. 5] and the anniversary of the Boston Tea Party [Dec. 16], the latter being the largest single-day fundraising effort in U.S. political history).

This latest money dump comes at the heels of a January 8 New Republic article that uncovered racist and homophobic comments written in Paul's newsletter through the 70's, 80's, and 90's-- comments the Texas congressman claims were penned without his knowlege. (His full response can be found here.)

Earlier this month, Paul told Reason Magazine: "Martin Luther King is one of my heroes because he believed in nonviolence and that's a libertarian principle... So I believe in civil disobedience if you understand the consequences. Martin Luther King was a great person because he did that and he changed America for the better because of that."

Posted by Matt Snyders at January 20, 2008 4:39 PM | Comments (28)

 

Giuliani vs. Ron Paul: Who's the fringe candidate?

Filed under: Ron Paul

This post on DailyKos nails something I've been thinking when I see Giuliani trailing Paul in each successive primary:

In case you're wondering how fringe candidate Ron Paul has fared against "front-runner" Rudy Giuliani, here are the approximate popular vote totals for both candidates so far this primary season (including 93% reporting from South Carolina):

Paul: 105,848 votes
Giuliani: 60,213 votes

The mainstream media is going to have to re-evaluate how it bestows "frontrunner" and "fringe" status on candidates from here on out.

Posted by Kevin Hoffman at January 20, 2008 4:00 PM | Comments (2)

 

Bobby Fischer Endorses Ron Paul, Dies

Filed under: Ron Paul

Chess superhero, noted anti-Semite, and fugitive from the law Bobby Fischer was quoted, hours before his death, endorsing Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul. "He is the only one who will take care of the Jews," Fischer reportedly mumbled to himself shortly before slipping into unconsciousness and meeting his maker.

Disclaimer: This isn't verifiably true, except for the Bobby Fischer dying part.

Posted by Jonathan Kaminsky at January 18, 2008 1:36 PM | Comments (1)

 

Logic Takes a U-Turn

Filed under: Ron Paul

Ron Paul, the straight-shooting OB-GYN/republican representative of Texas' 22nd district might be the only candidate for either major party who can openly disparage a group of people, and bank on their support.

It's reached an almost comedic point where if Ron Paul says something nasty about a group of people, that group, for whatever strange reason, seems compelled to support him. In The New Republic, James Kirchick thoroughly examines and documents Paul's decades-old tactic of using newsletters for the purpose of deriding blacks, gays, and liberals. Perhaps these groups haven't heard Paul's comments, perhaps they don't care, either way here are a couple choice contradictions of political statement and public support:
· In a 1992 newsletter, Paul wrote the about the L.A. riots "Order was only restored in L.A. when it came time for the blacks to pick up their welfare checks three days after rioting began" among other belittling statements. Furthermore, white supremacist Don Black donated to Paul's campaign. And yet in a baffling disruption of logic Paul is the leading Republican vote getter among blacks.
· In 1990 Paul wrote, "gays in San Francisco do not obey the dictates of good sense," adding: "[T]hese men don't really see a reason to live past their fifties. They are not married, they have no children, and their lives are centered on new sexual partners." But apparently that is not enough to keep Gays and Lesbians for Ron Paul from supporting him.

If this trend holds, wouldn't it seem that the best move Paul could make is to make borderline hate speech comments about all parts of the American population?

Posted by Ben Palosaari at January 8, 2008 5:44 PM

 

Paul supporters: "Fox News Sucks"

Filed under: Ron Paul

Ron Paul was excluded from the Fox News debates, and his supporters were ... nonplussed. Chanting "Fox News Sucks," their protests turned into a chase when Fox News Helmet Hair Issues Correspondent Sean Hannity was spotted walking to his car.

If they had actually caught up to Hannity and, say, given him a swirlie, I might change my mind about Ron Paul. Okay, that's not true. But it would have been funny.

I told Ben Palosaari about this video, and he asked me if Hannity whipped out a concealed carry permit and a handgun. No, I said, but you know who would win if Sean Hannity got into a gunfight with Ron Paul? America.

Posted by Jeff Shaw at January 8, 2008 12:30 PM | Comments (0)