Grand Ol' Opry SMACKDOWN!

From LAUNCH Radio Networks:

The Dixie Chicks want out of the country music scene, according to comments group member Martie Maguire made to German magazine, Spiegel. She said, "We don't feel part of the country scene any longer, it can't be our home any more."

Like nobody saw this coming...

Mainstream Nashville is a whore. If it were suddenly cool to be a cross-dressing, gay, Republican, Toby Keith would fly to the White House wearing eye-shadow and lipstick to fellate the President at a press conference in the Rose Garden with a Ford pickup in the background.

Somewhere along the way, these publicity stunts (Entertainment Weekly cover) and "controversial statements" that the Dixie Chicks have made got confused with typical Americans taking a historical stand on a particular issue.

The suits at Sony Nashville realize that despite all the alleged backlash from the pencil pushers who run radio at ClearChannel, Infinity, and Disney, the Chicks pretty much sold out their entire recent jaunt through the States...thousands and thousands of girls and women, aged 13 to 45...BUYING POWER my friend (and money in the coffers of those stations that supposedly took them off the air, but left their station logos up all around the arenas...just in case...). The only way to sell your beleaguered twangy girl act, is to make them a beleaguered twangy girl act. Call up your buddies the Mays Boys and tell them to take the Chicks off their country stations...we got a great idea to phase them into Rock/Pop when they get back from Europe...their naturally big mouths are GOLDEN!

You can start counting now...10...9...8...Toby Keith will say some knuckleheaded thing to counter this latest "statement," thus boosting HIS sales too. Create a little consumerist friction at home between the guys and gals, and pass it off as "political controversy." This isn't PoliSci 101, this is P.T. Barnum, the third and maybe most important progenitor, along with Billy Joel and Elton John, of "Today's Best Country."

The differences between the Chicks/Nashville-Keith controversy and the "feud" between Brock Lesnar and Kurt Angle are negligible...politically, personally, and most importantly, economically. I once saw Brock snap the University of Illinois heavyweight's hip like a twig (I heard the pop) at Williams Arena, and almost get disqualified for an illegal hold that resulted in a serious injury. That fight was real and there were CONSEQUENCES for the participants. Anybody catch the Chicks playing for gas money and eating tuna fish sandwiches at rest stops lately?

If I was Johnny Cash, I'da up and died too.