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Stoners break Gophers' record with Video Gophers hours after historic loss

Thousands of stoners across the state of Minnesota spent Friday night attempting to beat the Gophers' newest record using their copies of NCAA Football '07. Many were successful.

Just hours earlier, in giving up a 38-7 lead and losing 44-41 in overtime, Minnesota set a Division 1-A record for the biggest choke in bowl game history.

Blake Olson, a dopehead from Crystal who prefers Thai stick quipped, "You think Mason's a shitty coach in real life, you should see him on XBOX." Olson and bongwater pal Phil Larson of Brooklyn Park, who prefers Maui Wowie, staked the Gophers to a 58-7 lead in the 3rd quarter--a conservative 20 point differential for testing purposes--before Texas Tech came roaring back in the face of suddenly one dimensional offensive and defensive gameplans.

"We're trying to find a way," said Larson, "to make Mase do his whole 'game of two halves' routine with the sideline reporter, but I think we're too baked, man." Olson later intimated that they were going to try and figure that out tomorrow morning while his mother made them some eggs.

Posted by Jack Sparks at December 30, 2006 9:25 AM

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