June 2004

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Misc Debris

Filed under: Imported

1. I received a copy of the new McSweeney's, guest edited by Daniel Clowes, in the mail today. (Actually, two copies--because I ordered one for my brother and the dipshits sent it to the wrong address.) It's a stunningly gorgeous object. You feel guilty bending back the pages or soiling it with spilt tea. I'm just starting to digest the visual feast. Douglas Wolk's swell piece about the volume ran a few weeks ago in City Pages. The price is steep, $24.00, but well worth it.

2. Daniel Gross deftly deconstructs the Bush Boom.

3. The Thunder will attempt to advance to the third round of the U.S. Open Cup tomorrow night at 7 p.m. at The Jimmy. Their opponent: Boulder Rapids Reserve. Details, as always, at Blue Sky.

4. Two books I can't wait to get my hands on: Franklin Foer's How Soccer Explains the World and Jonathan Ames' Wake Up, Sir!

Posted by Paul Demko at June 29, 2004 6:53 PM

 

Homeless World Cup II

Filed under: Imported

What kind of team will we have this year? Even after several months of planning and twice-weekly practices, after recruiting players at the food lines and in the shelters, with all the interest we'd stirred up—we had just a few bona fide candidates who could play, travel legally and pass the medical tests. But then three new players walked in: two hailing from Peru, the other from Haiti. Not only do they have their papers in order, they're naturals on the grass.

Posted by Paul Demko at June 22, 2004 3:52 PM

 

Misc. Debris

Filed under: Imported

1. Alejandro Escovedo is selling a new live album, Por Vida, via his web site. (For those in the Twin Cites, the Electric Fetus has a few copies.) I've always admired Escovedo's albums more than adored them. But his eyepopping live performances are a whole other matter. Por Vida was mostly recorded in Austin and Asheville, but there's one track, "Sad & Dreamy (The Big 10)," from his August, 2002 show at the Turf Club. Escovedo wrote the infectious meditation on growing old with a bunch of elementary school kids, and the drunks at the Turf belt out the chorus with appropriate glee: "I hit the big One-O, I feel so old, and candy just doesn't taste as good anymore." I think I can hear my own beery yelp in the mix.

And oh yeah: Next month Or Music will release a two-cd Alejandro tribute album, featuring such notables as Vic Chesnutt, Lucinda Williams, and John Cale. Proceeds will go towards helping pay the singer's medical bills. Escovedo was hospitalized with Hepatitis C in April, 2003, and has just recently begun performing again.

2. Hillary in '08: I was listening to some program on the Patriot II this morning. (Somehow I'd been blissfully ignorant of this station's existence, but now that Mosedale has pointed it out to me I must listen.) Lord knows what show it was. The host sounded southern and angry. He was pointing out that Bill Clinton (naturally) was to blame for gay marriage--and by extension the destruction of America.

Anyway, one of the program's astute listeners called in to float the theory that the Democrats will dump Kerry at the convention and anoint Hillary. This is not a new hypothesis: I hear the same damn theory espoused at least once a week on right-wing talk radio. The level of paranoia and visceral hatred directed at Hillary on a daily basis is simply astounding. They're maniacally obsessed. I'm convinced Rush Limbaugh (and Laura Ingraham) masturbates to her image daily. If Hillary becomes president they'll completely lose their minds. It'll be some spectacle.

3. Minnesota Thunder v. Portland Timbers: This evening at 7 p.m. they will battle for first place at The Jimmy.

Posted by Paul Demko at June 22, 2004 1:38 PM

 

De Oranje Juiced

Filed under: Imported

Today's Netherlands-Czech Republic Euro 2004 match might just be the most fantastically entertaining soccer game I've ever witnessed. Everyone knows that the Dutch play some of the most skillful attacking soccer in the world (they're just not particularly adept at winning), but what of my native peeps the Czechs?

After falling behind 2-0 in the opening 20 minutes, they attacked the Dutch ferociously, flying up the field and cracking shots at every opportunity. The offensive fireworks in the first half alone were sufficient to make me momentarily forget the countless nil-nil ties I've slogged through over the years. Both sides could have easily scored a half-dozen goals if not for some valiant goalkeeping. The Czechs did manage to pull one goal back, courtesy of Jan Koller, before the break.  

There was no slacking of pace in the second half. Pavel Nedved unleashed two of the most crackerjack one-time shots I've ever seen, blazing one off the crossbar from what must of been 40 yards out, and having another snuffed out by an eye-popping save from Dutch keeper Edwin Van der Sar. (Am I missing something or is Nedved the best freakin' player in the world?) De Oranje's prolific scoring forward, Ruud van Nistlerooy, meanwhile, should have put his side comfortably ahead, but he was twice denied at point-blank range by Czech keeper Petr Cech. 

Milan Baros finally brought the Czechs even with a blistering, curling shot that Van der Sar did well to even get a finger on in the 71st minute. And then, with just a couple of minutes remaining, Baros' Liverpool teammate, Vladimir Smicer, calmly slotted in the game winner.

The Czechs are through to the quarterfinals. I wouldn't bet against 'em to win the whole damn thing. The ill-fated Dutch are likely headed home. (Hopefully the lousy Italians will be joining 'em.)

(Karel Bruckner is the coolest coach in the world.)

Posted by Paul Demko at June 19, 2004 6:17 PM

 

Horns & Blow

Filed under: Imported

I wrote a piece about Hugh Masekela's highly entertaining new autobiography, Still Grazing, for this week's City Pages. But in my enthusiasm to detail the South African trumpeter's redoubtable indulgences in sex, drugs, and booze, I almost completely neglected his equally fascinating childhood. 

Masekela spent his early years in Witbank, a coal mining town populated by impoverished itinerant workers from all over southern Africa. He lived with his grandmother, Johanna, a feisty shebeen owner who dispensed poisonous sorghum beer to the wretched migrants (and then often beat the snot out of them when they got out of hand). "Nobody cared too much about the mineworkers' lives," Masekela writes. "No one in Witbank, not even Johanna, knew their real names or cared too much when they died."

This astounding anecdote concerns two of Johanna's lodgers:

One Sunday morning, George and Molly were arguing in their back room when Molly suddenly ran to the coal shed next to the chicken coop, grabbed an ax, ran back into the room, and continued the fight with George. A few seconds later, George emerged with the ax embedded in his forehead. Bassie, Johanna, and the other early drinkers tried in vain to dislodge it from his skull as the thick blood oozed from the wound, trickling down his face and clotting on his white shirt. Everybody was scolding Molly, who was trembling and weeping like a little baby. Johanna screamed louder than anyone: "You evil little satanic bitch, jezebel whore piece of shit! I hope the poor boy dies so that the white people can hang your little stinking black ass straight into hell where you belong--with the devil. That way I can be rid of both of you for good!" George, protesting through the river of blood flowing from in and around his mouth, gurgled weakly, 'No, Auntie Johanna, don't let me die!' Johanna shot back, "Shut up, you bloody makwerekwere shit. I'm tired of both of you bloody nincompoops!" 

Poor George is eventually taken to the local health clinic and the axe is successfully removed.

The Connection recently aired an interesting interview with Masekela.

Posted by Paul Demko at June 16, 2004 4:53 PM

 

The Phil Hendrie Show

Filed under: Imported

It occurs to me that this may be old news for most people, and that I'm outing myself as hopelessly behind the curve in my talk-radio obsession, but I just recently realized that the great Phil Hendrie is now on the air in the Twin Cities. Granted it's just once a week (Saturdays from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. on KSTP), but any limited dose of Hendrie is extremely good news. (This is particularly so given that his show is only available on-line at a cost of $6.95 per month.)

For those unfamiliar with Hendrie's gonzo talk radio schtick, I'm not even going to bother attempting to describe his peculiar genius. That's because Paul Cullum does a better job than I ever could in his excellent L.A. Weekly piece this week detailing Hendrie's futile attempts to get an animated sitcom on the TV. It's not easily excerpted so just read the whole damn thing.

But here's one little, locally relevant tidbit about Hendrie's tenure at WCCO in the early Nineties.

The same day he got canned from [WSB AM in Atlanta], he was hired at WCCO in Minneapolis, which he describes as "like walking into a mausoleum." Despite a plaque behind the front desk commemorating the station's many 30-year employees, Hendrie lasted only a year, bailing for the warm weather and built-in insanity of Miami and the comedy-talk format of WIOD.

(Thanks to Nagel for the heads up.)

Posted by Paul Demko at June 14, 2004 3:47 PM

 

Showdown with the Spice Boyz

Filed under: Imported

I've only walked out on one bar tab in my life. It was during the 1998 World Cup. I was living in D.C. at the time and some faux-Irish pub had advertised in the local weekly that they'd be showing all games on the big-screen TV. My brother and I proceeded to drink many pints of Guinness at said establishment while happily watching the opening weekend matches.

But then midway through the viewing of Nigeria-Italy, which they were showing on tape delay, and which was one of the finest matches of the first round, the hockey fans started arriving. The Washington Capitols were deep into the playoffs and the place was soon packed with puckheads. Apparently the bar staff no longer gave a shit about us soccer geeks because they turned the game off smack-dab in the middle. No amount of protesting could convince the bartender to rescind this decision.

So we walked. The bastards deserved it.

The U.S. commences 2006 World Cup qualifying this Sunday against the mighty Spice Boyz of Grenada (population 89,018, or roughly the same as Duluth). There's a terrific piece about the match in USA Today. I missed the U.S. squad's last tune-up, against Honduras, but by all accounts they played fiendishly well in the 4-0 romp.

The game will be televised on ESPN2 at noon CST on Sunday.(Bruce has the lowdown on exactly how the qualifying process works for those who are interested.) 

Saturday also marks the commencement of Euro 2004. Sunday's throwdown between England and France should be ridiculously entertaining.

Unfortunately the games are only available in the U.S. via pay-per-view. A couple of local bars, The Local and Brit's, are showing all the matches. But they're charging $20 per person for admission.

If you do go, please pay your tab.

(And oh yeah. The Minnesota Thunder will attempt to run their home record to 6-0 this Saturday at 6 p.m. at Jimmy Griffin Stadium.)

UPDATE: Andy, of Blue Sky Soccer renown, reports that Mapps coffee shop, 1810 Riverside Avenue in Minneapolis (on the West Bank), is also showing the Euro 2004 games live, and for just $5.

Posted by Paul Demko at June 10, 2004 4:41 PM

 

Another Excuse to Get Drunk

Filed under: Imported

Grand Champeen wrap up their three-night Twin Cities stand this evening at the Turf Club. I caught their gig Saturday night at the Triple Rock and--even though I was half plowed and completely exhausted--they once again made my socks roll up and down with their ferocious meat-cleaver rock n' roll.

The Austin, Texas quartet also made an appearance at Grand Young Day at the Turf (which, by the way, was wall to wall drunken loons) on Sunday. But they were rumored to still be fourth in the queue to pay homage to Neil when I took off at 11 or so.

Tonight they'll be sharing a bill with Two Cow Garage. The last time these two packs of degenerates played together in town they joined forces to usher in last call with an absurd six guitar, three bass (give or take an instrument) cover of "Freebird" that concluded with the drum kit being demolished. (For photographic evidence of the destruction at Lee's go here.) Unfortunately there were probably more folks on stage than in the audience to witness this mayhem.

Posted by Paul Demko at June 8, 2004 4:23 PM

 

I'm Sure it has Nothing Whatsoever to do with Ratings

Filed under: Imported

I set my alarm clock to Bob Davis' hyperactive KSTP morning talk radio program. His nonsensical rants about the liberal media and the glories of Bush's foreign adventures are so goddamn annoying that it forces me out of bed. (Of course, oftentimes I just go back to sleep after turning off the alarm.)

This morning the topic of discussion was the media's unseemly obsession with weather. I couldn't agree more, but somehow this caller's explanation of the phenomenon is lacking. "It keeps them from reporting other things," he explained. "Like how good the economy is. Or how well things are really going in Iraq."

And what of all the good news out of Nigeria? Or Congo? Or ...  damn liberal media.

Posted by Paul Demko at June 2, 2004 10:09 AM

 

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