That said, I'm now going to burden you with my bad-beat saga from Monday night. I rarely play poker out at Canterbury Park. Why? Because I lose. Of the dozen or so times I've gone out there to play cards during the last six years I've probably walked out ahead twice. That's not a win-loss ratio with very good long-term financial implications.

Why do I lose? I don't know. Probably because I play poorly. But like every gambler I'm inclined to blame the high house rake, the erratic behavior of low limit players, and bad luck.

I went out there Monday night because they were holding the first Chippy Poker "Biscuit Invitational". Naturally I couldn't resist sitting down at a $2/$4 limit hold 'em table with $80.

For the first hour I pretty much treaded water, winning a couple of meager pots. But then things headed south quickly. My pair of aces got outkicked and my trip fives got sucked out on by a straight.

So I'm down to about half my stack when the table starts to get screwy, as it so often does with low stakes poker. The guy one off the big blind puts out a live straddle, meaning he's raised the bet to $4 without looking at his cards. Then the guy next to him--a talkative, drunken jackass--raises it up to $6. Everyone folds around to me. I look down to see Ace-King, both of diamonds. I call. (Should I have re-raised there?)

We've got four people in the pot. The flop comes Ace, two, nine, with the latter two cards being clubs. Now the Jackass who'd made it $6 before the flop leads out with a $2 bet. I bump it up to $4. There are two callers, including the Jackass.

Fourth street brings another rag, not of clubs. So now I've got top pair, but some fear of a flush draw. The Jackass checks. I bet $4. The other dude folds. Jackass calls.

Now the river: ten of clubs. Jackass bets. I know I'm beat. He's obviously hit the flush. But I'm also obviously pot committed, so I call. He flips over two clubs. I lose.

But here's the kicker. The two clubs that the Jackass showed? Five and seven! This moron raised it up to three bets before the flop with five-seven suited! And got paid off handsomely for doing so. I then proceeded to quickly give away the rest of my stack.