Horse Racing

Canterbury Triple Crown: Beer, Betting, and Belmont UPDATEDx4

Filed under: Horse Racing

This Saturday you'll find me screaming my fool head off at Canterbury Park, wagering this week's pay on the Triple Crown.

Our local place to play the ponies is hosting special Belmont Stakes betting in honor of Big Brown, who has a chance to make history by becoming the first horse in 30 years to win the Triple Crown.

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Posted by Kevin Hoffman at June 7, 2008 11:15 AM | Comments (0)

 

The Short Money

Filed under: Horse Racing

From:
Jack K. Sparks
Hillbilly Number One
El Platano Blanco

To:
SGT Sparkes, Michael
FSC 1-327 IN REG
1ST ARMORED DIV
Somewhere Overseas

Cousin Mike,

Spring is breaking across Minnesota; however, we aren't experiencing it fully because the good Lord has seen fit to extend old Martinmas into damn near May. Unfortunately, Mother Nature's roulette wheel always lands on Black around this time of year as she ushers in all of Summer's shortsighted pursuits. Chief among these are man's search for sustenance from the feral fauna of the land, and, man's search for the big score from an endless procession of glue factory nags at Parimutuel windows from Santa Anita to Belmont.

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Posted by Jack Sparks at April 29, 2008 10:37 PM | Comments (2)

 

Derby days are here again

Filed under: Horse Racing

Jack K. Sparks--hillbilly music aficionado, Kansas City Royals fan, and certain product of at least three generations of inbreeding--has been sending me hostile, deranged emails for months about the Kentucky Derby. On opening day of the baseball season, slurping Miller Lite like a hog at a trough, the drunken savage hollered at me incoherently until I agreed to go in with him on some ludicrous superfecta bet on the first Saturday in May. (Which by the way is the name of a documentary about the Kentucky Derby that opens on Friday at the Lagoon.) It was almost as pathetic as watching that sad drunk Hank Goldberg analyze races for ESPN.

But with all the significant prep races out of the way it's time to start seriously contemplating the field for the finest day on the racing calendar. There's still the Lexington Stakes this Saturday, but only a few half-assed contenders (Atoned, Salute the Sarge and Tomcito) are slated to run.

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Posted by Paul Demko at April 17, 2008 1:42 PM | Comments (2)

 

Street Sense, Hard Spun, Curlin and some other sad beasts

Filed under: Horse Racing

After the madness of the Kentucky Derby--20 horses jostling for a clean patch of dirt for a mile and a quarter--The Preakness is something of a letdown. The field is set at nine, with only four Derby contestants returning to the starting gate at Pimlico. Street Sense will be there, of course, along with the other two horses that finished in the money, Curlin and Hard Spun. The other retread is Circular Quay, a late runner that I was dumb enough to throw some money at two weeks ago and who finished sixth.

There's a reason none of the other five horses competed in the Derby. They look to be a bunch of stiffs. King of the Roxy is the only semi-impressive beast, having finished second (to Tiago) in the Santa Anita Derby. I'm also semi-intrigued by C.P. West, who's only finished out of the money once in eight runs, but against suspect competition.

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Posted by Paul Demko at May 18, 2007 2:45 PM | Comments (1)

 

P.A. and Dubay

Filed under: Horse Racing

Horseracing guru Steve Davidowitz will be on the show around 11 a.m. P.A. says he likes Tiago, Dominica, and Great Hunter. Wagering commences in less than seven hours!

Posted by Paul Demko at May 3, 2007 10:03 AM | Comments (2)

 

Queen Elizabeth and the smart money is on Street Sense

Filed under: Horse Racing

Here's the Derby lineup:

1 Sedgefield 50-1
2 Curlin 7-2
3 Zanjero 30-1
4 Storm in May 30-1
5 Imawildandcrazyguy 50-1
6 Cowtown Cat 20-1
7 Street Sense 4-1
8 Hard Spun 15-1
9 Liquidity 30-1
10 Teuflesberg 30-1
11 Bwana Bull 50-1
12 Nobiz Like Shobiz 8-1
13 Sam P. 20-1
14 Scat Daddy 10-1
15 Tiago 15-1
16 Circular Quay 8-1
17 Stormello 30-1
18 Any Given Saturday 12-1
19 Dominican 20-1
20 Great Hunter 15-1

Continue reading "Queen Elizabeth and the smart money is on Street Sense"

Posted by Paul Demko at May 3, 2007 8:57 AM | Comments (2)

 

Queen Elizabeth AND little Dannielynn...

Filed under: Horse Racing

He had done a few good sketches, but so far we hadn't seen that special kind of face that I felt we would need for a lead drawing. It was a face I'd seen a thousand times at every Derby I'd ever been to. I saw it, in my head, as the mask of the whiskey gentry--a pretentious mix of booze, failed dreams and a terminal identity crisis; the inevitable result of too much inbreeding in a closed and ignorant culture. One of the key genetic rules in breeding dogs, horses or any other kind of thoroughbred is that close inbreeding tends to magnify the weak points in a bloodline as well as the strong points. In horse breeding, for instance, there is a definite risk in breeding two fast horses who are both a little crazy. The offspring will likely be very fast and also very crazy. So the trick in breeding thoroughbreds is to retain the good traits and filter out the bad. But the breeding of humans is not so wisely supervised, particularly in a narrow Southern society where the closest kind of inbreeding is not only stylish and acceptable, but far more convenient--to the parents--than setting their offspring free to find their own mates, for their own reasons and in their own ways.

--Hunter S. Thompson, The Kentucky Derby is Decadent and Depraved, Scanlan's Monthly, vol 1, no. 4, June 1970

Nobody writes alt-pop love songs about the demure yet pretty Sarbanes-Oxley audit girl and her pale grey eyes. Writing about music for so many years, I've been forced to think in metaphors, similes, and subjective language so much, that when an "objective" event like the Kentucky Derby rolls around, I have to jackhammer all of the meaningless bullshit out of my brains so that I can wring the truth from the filth soaked rag of the horseracing business. People have spent the past week pissing all over themselves about whether Teuflesberg will get into the big dance. Who gives a damn? Also, I've been waiting for the inevitable paen to long odds...8 column inches on why Tiago is a lot like Giacomo and all boat dreams will come true after 1 1/4 miles of magic. These horses could come in for you and pay big on a large bet...and then you'd be able to move Little Vito and his mom to Maine and help him get his life in order.

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Posted by Jack Sparks at May 1, 2007 11:26 PM | Comments (3)

 

What Demko knows after the Blue Grass Stakes

Filed under: Horse Racing

The Blue Grass Stakes from Keeneland was the kind of race that would make you turn around and start scanning the box seats for a smiling John Gotti, smoking a cigar and shaking hands with his associates. Watching the horses down the backstretch in this garbage race, you couldn't help but think to yourself that the fix was in. Five jockeys had their donkeys out for a casual afternoon stroll and they were all going to wait until the quarter poll to turn it on. At the post, Street Sense was at even money and Great Hunter was 2nd at 9-5. And the horsey wizards were falling all over themselves after the race trying to convince everyone that's exactly how it would have played out, had the race not been "paceless," which is just paddock code for "everyone shook hands and agreed not to actually race their 'racehorses' until the backstretch."

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Posted by Jack Sparks at April 17, 2007 11:40 AM | Comments (1)

 

Degenerate alcoholic offers Kentucky Derby superfecta wagering advice

Filed under: Horse Racing

The voice on the other end sounded groggy. Demko was either in an opium den or incredibly bored with what he was doing.

"Are you watching the ponies motherfucker?" Small pause. "Oh, oh yeah those races are today aren't they?"

Having to remind Demko that the Wood Memorial, Illinois Derby, and Santa Anita were all running in the space of approximately one hour on one day, usually, would be like reminding Julia Roberts to brush her teeth. But there it was, a fish out of water.

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Posted by Jack Sparks at April 8, 2007 12:57 PM | Comments (1)

 

More Derby musings

Filed under: Horse Racing

The redoubtable Garwood B. Jones, best known for his Wolves-related commentary in this spot, has sent forth some lengthy, informative (and undoubtedly misguided) commentary on Saturday's race. Because it's difficult to post links in the comments section (and because he sucked up to me by making an informed comment about poor Frankie Hejduk), I'm posting it as a separate item. Keep those comments coming! Soon I will post my superfecta pick so that all can be sufficiently warned away from those poor, doomed beasts.

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Posted by Paul Demko at May 4, 2006 3:58 PM | Comments (1)

 

Derby Day: half-baked ruminations on horseracing's finest day

Filed under: Horse Racing

One of the grandest days of the sporting calendar is upon us. On Saturday the 132nd Kentucky Derby will take place at Churchill Downs. Even better for local horseracing junkies, Canterbury Park opens its summer season that same day. In honor of this occassion, over the last couple of days I've conducted an email discussion with two renowned gamblers and jackasses, Jack Sparks and James "Taco" Martin. Hopefully this discussion can continue in the comments section below.

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Posted by Paul Demko at May 3, 2006 2:35 PM | Comments (24)

 

Bet the ponies

Filed under: Horse Racing

It's down to the final three weekends of racing at Canterbury Park. This Sunday is the "Festival of Champions," an annual event for the top Minnesota-bred horses. There's a slew of big money (by Canterbury standards) stakes races with a total purse of $320,000.

Entries haven't been finalized yet, but a few intriguing horses will definitely be somewhere in the mix. Wally's Choice (partially owned by Wally the Beerman), who's already won a $40,000 stakes race at Canterbury this season and has nearly $300,000 in lifetime winnings, will certainly be one beast to watch. According to track analyst Kevin Gorg, Wally's Choice will most likely face off against Key Issues. That horse has already had a mammoth season, winning the $60,000 Minnesota Derby and another $40,000 stakes race.

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Posted by Paul Demko at August 17, 2005 12:48 PM | Comments (0)

 

Wally the Horseman

Filed under: Horse Racing

Saturday's Belmont Stakes doesn't seem to be generating a whole lot of enthusiasm. Folks have become spoiled in recent years with a surfeit of potential Triple Crown winners heading into the final leg, most recently Smarty Jones and Funny Cide.

But there also seems to be a general consensus that this year's Belmont field is a bit rank. A.P Arrow and Nolan's Cat, in particular, look more like candidates for the glue factory than the winner's circle. Then again, nobody was much talking about Birdstone last year prior to his upset victory.

Afleet Alex, after an incredible performance in the Preakness, is the overwhelming favorite. Even so, some publicity-starved jackasses continue to insist that jockey Jeremy Rose should be replaced. (Thanks to the redoubtable Jeff Johnson for the link.)

But even if you can't get stirred up about the Belmont, there's another reason to head out to Canterbury Park this Saturday. The seventh race, the $50,000 Brooks Field Stakes, which is set to go off a little before the Belmont, features a top-flight, 12-horse field of turf racers.

The slight favorite, at odds of 7/2, is Vazandar. The Minnesota-bred horse has already won two races at Canterbury this season.

Kevin Gorg, who handicaps races for the Star Tribune, likes Slew Slayer. The four-year-old gelding, currently going off at 5-1, is in from Arlington Park in Chicago. He's only won about $60,000, but has generally faced competition a class above what he'll see on Saturday.

But most intriguing is Wally's Choice, pegged at odds of 9/2. The four-year-old gelding had a monster 2004. Last summer at Canterbury he won both the Minnesota Classic and the Minnesota Derby, raking in more than $80,000 for the season.

Wally's Choice really turned heads, though, last November at the Oklahoma Derby. Going off at odds of 33-1, he rallied from last in the field down the stretch to capture the $168,550 stakes race.

In 17 lifetime races, Wally's Choice has posed in the winner's circle eight times and taken third place on three occasions. (Strangely the horse has never finished second.) 

But what makes Saturday's mount even more compelling is that it will be the first time that Wally's Choice has run on the turf. "His mother, L'Etoile Jolie, was a monster on the turf," notes Gorg.

And oh yeah: Wally's Choice is partially owned by Wally McNeil, better known as Wally the Beerman.

Posted by Paul Demko at June 9, 2005 4:07 PM

 

Malibu Moonshine is a lock to win the Preakness

Filed under: Horse Racing

Following the Kentucky Derby, the Washington Post's redoubtable racing scribe Andrew Beyer wrote an extremely cranky old-man screed about what a dismal race it was. He closed the column by pretty much accusing the entire 20-horse field of doping violations. The piece came off like the rantings of a man who just couldn't handle the fact that he'd been spectacularly wrong about the Derby.

Thankfully Beyer rebounds today with a persuasively argued handicapping of the 14-horse Preakness field. He's still oozing disdain for Giacomo (and pretty much every other three-year-old thoroughbred on the planet), but he makes a compelling case for why Afleet Alex is being overhyped and why Greeley's Galaxy and Closing Argument are the two most intriguing horses in the field.

Over in the Baltimore Sun, John Eisenberg has a swell column about a new Bud Greenspan documentary premiering today on ESPN Classic at 2 p.m CST. (It will air again tomorrow at 10 a.m. CST) The film details the career of 1941 Triple Crown winner Whirlaway. The mercurial colt is best known for walking out of the gate at the start of the Preakness--only to come back and trounce the field.

Personally I'll be pulling for King Leatherbury tomorrow.

Posted by Paul Demko at May 20, 2005 2:35 PM

 

Derby Day

Filed under: Horse Racing

For the first time ever Canterbury Park's opening meet will coincide with the running of the Kentucky Derby. It should make for a fabulous day out at the track. Post time is 1:30 p.m.

Bellamy Road is obviously the beast to beat in the 20-horse Derby field. The George Steinbrenner-owned thoroughbred tied a 32-year-old course record in winning the Wood Memorial by 17 1/2 lengths last month. That monster performance (warranting a stratospheric 120 Beyer speed rating) ensured that he'll go off as the favorite, currently at odds of 5-2. Following a week of impressive workouts at Churchill Downs, everyone seems to be a Bellamy Road believer. Daily Racing Form columnists Andrew Beyer and Steven Crist both predict the frontrunner will romp through the field. (You can read Beyer's take for free in the Washington Post.) The only knock on Bellamy Road is that he hasn't raced enough, just twice this year and five times total. Only one horse in the last 57 years--Sunny's Halo in 1983--has won the Derby in his third race of the year.

Afleet Alex is the sentimental favorite, currently at odds of 9-2. He barely survived as a newborn because his mamma didn't have enough milk to nourish him. He had to be weened on a Coors Light beer bottle. The horse's breeder is sick with cancer of the colon and liver. And Afleet Alex overcame a lung infection to crush the field in the Arkansas Derby.

The only other entrant drawing much acclaim is Bandini, the rambunctious sire of Fusaichi Pegasus. He won the Blue Grass Stakes and has tremendous potential, but is unpredictable.

A couple of other horses that I'm intrigued by. Buzzard's Bay won the Santa Anita Derby (usually considered the most prestigious Derby prep race), but can't get any respect. He's currently at 20-1, probably owing to a lackluster Beyer speed rating of 98. Greeley's Galaxy topped the Illinois Derby, but still didn't have enough earnings to make the cut for Churchill Downs. His owner ponied up an extra $200,000 to get him into the race. Greeley's Galaxy has the third best Breyer rating in the field, but is still going off at odds of 15-1.

Posted by Paul Demko at May 6, 2005 3:35 PM